Welcome to my Life
by In the light of a shadow
Summary: 4 lives that look perfect on the outside, but is breaking them on the inside. Eventually Faberittana On hiatus
1. Prologue

**_A/N: This story contains abuse, anorexia, domestic discipline, spanking, femslash and four girls in one relationship (Faberittana). Don't like these things, don't read._**

**_Please leave a review, I love to hear your ideas. Please note that English isn't my native language, so sorry for any mistakes._**

**_This chapter is more like a television version. So while the song is played in the background, you can see those things. Next chapter will be a normal chapter._**

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><p><em>Do you ever feel like breaking down?<br>Do you ever feel out of place?  
>Like somehow you just don't belong<br>And no one understands you_

_Do __you __ever __wanna __run__away?  
>Do <em>_you __lock __yourself __in __your __room?  
>With <em>_the __radio __on, __turned __up __so __loud  
>That <em>_no __one __hears __you __screaming_

Brittany opening her front door, walking into the house. A conversation with her mother leaves her in tears. Running up the stairs, punching a picture of her and her four sisters, breaking the glass.

_No you don't know what it's like  
>When nothing feels alright<br>You don't know what it's like, to be like me_

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_  
><em>To be kicked, when you're down<em>  
><em>To feel like you've been pushed around<em>

Rachel opening her front door, trying to sneak into the house. Her father pulling her into the room, alcohol and drugs on the table. He shouting at her, before punching her in the stomach, as she falls to the ground another kick in her stomach. Another yell, before he falls onto the couch. Rachel crawling up the stairs.

_To be on the edge of breaking down  
>When no one's there to save you<br>No you don't know what it's like  
>Welcome to my life<em>

_Do you wanna be somebody else?_  
><em>Are you sick of feeling so left out?<em>  
><em>Are you desperate to find something more<em>  
><em>Before your life is over?<em>

_Are you stuck inside a world you hate?_  
><em>Are you sick of everyone around?<em>  
><em>With the big fake smiles and stupid lies<em>  
><em>Well deep inside you're bleeding<em>

Quinn opening her front door, walking into a big, clean, perfect looking house. She fakes a smile, when she sits at the dinner table. Hardly putting anything on her plate, she plays more with her food than she eats of it. Her father angry looking at her, making her leave the table and walk upstairs.

_No you don't know what it's like_  
><em>When nothing feels alright<em>  
><em>You don't know what it's like to be like me<em>

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in th edark_  
><em>To be kicked, when you're down<em>  
><em>To feel like you've been pushed around<em>

_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
><em>When no one's there to save you<em>  
><em>No you don't know what it's like<em>  
><em>Welcome to my life<em>

_No one ever lies straight to your face_  
><em>And no one ever stabbed you in the back<em>  
><em>You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay<em>

_Everybody always gave you what you wanted_  
><em>You never had to work it was always there<em>  
><em>You don't know what it's like, what it's like<em>

Santana opening her front door. Softly closing the door. A big house, but not as clean as Quinn's. Dropping her bag on the couch, she listens to the voicemail. Sighing she grabs a pen and goes to the calendar. Where there stood 'parents back' she scratches it and write it again two week later. The calendar is full with these kind of scratched notes. Grabbing a bowl of ice cream, she walks up the stairs.

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_  
><em>To be kicked when you're down<em>  
><em>To feel like you've been pushed around<em>

_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
><em>When no one's there to save you<em>  
><em>No you don't know what it's like<em>

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_  
><em>To be kicked when you're down<em>  
><em>To feel like you've been pushed around<em>

_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
><em>When no one's there to save you<em>  
><em>No you don't know what it's like<em>

_Welcome to my life_

Brittany dancing in front of her mirror, bandage on her right hand. Makes a mistakes, and starts all over again. Makes the same mistake again, causing her to hit the mirror before she falls on to her bed.

_Welcome to my life_

Rachel standing in front of her mirror, slowly taking of her clothes. She traces some of the bruises on her battered body, before collapsing on the bed, tears rolling down her cheeks.

_Welcome to my life_

Quinn hanging over the toilet, looking sick. Flushing the toilet she washes her mouth, before crawling into her bed.

_Welcome to my life_

Santana sitting on her bed, eating the ice cream, watching some stupid movie, while tears rolling down her cheeks. Throwing the spoon at the television, she falls back on her bed.


	2. Shut Up

**_Thanks for all the reviews, and being honest in them. I really look forward to hear your opinions about this chapter. _**

**Shut up**

_Quinn POV_

The world stopped for a moment, while the shock was seen on their faces. Even though I couldn't see my own face, I was sure it looked the same as that of San and Britt. I didn't even remember the comment Santana made, my mind completely blank, repeating the words Manhands had said over and over in my head. _Just shut up._ Berry had told the Latina to shut up. Rachel Berry had told Santana Lopez to shut up.

"What did you say," Santana hissed, slamming the locker next to the smaller girl.

There was some fear on the diva's face, before it looked confident again. She looked at the cheerleader, almost challenging her. "You heard me." She put the last of her books in het locker and closed it softly.

One of the jocks walked by with a slushie in his hand, and Santana grabbed it. In one swift motion she wanted to throw the slushie in the girl's face, but Berry somehow managed to grab the wrist, making the girl spill the slushie over herself.

This was going wrong, this was going terrible wrong. I got my phone and quickly texted Puck, **rach lock now.** The angry glare the Latina gave Berry earlier, was nothing in comparison of the fury that was coming from her face right now. Her hands shot forward, around the girl's neck, keeping the little girl in place with one hand, she formed a fist with her other one and started to hit the diva in her face.

Brit finally unfroze and pulled her girlfriend away, locking her arms around the others waist and arms. Berry immediately fell on the ground, now the other girl was no longer holding her up. Brit was whispering something to the other girl, but San's face was still filled with rage and didn't even seem to hear the blond. She struggled against the hold on her. As Brittany tried to strengthen her grasp, the Latina shove the blond against the lockers. Not even looking back, she started kicking Rachel in the stomach.

I didn't know what to do. I couldn't let San beat the crap out of her, no matter how annoying she was. But I didn't have the strength to pull her back. I wanted to help B, but the angry look on her face terrified me. B never looked angry, never. Just as B got back to her feet, Puck finally showed up. Grabbing Santana he again pulled her off Berry. Santana again struggled, trying to break free, but Puck continued to drag her away. The look on his face telling he had a hard time containing the girl. I'd never been so happy to see Zizes. Granted I never really was happy to see Zizes. She reminded me of my Lucy Caboosy past, something I was trying so hard to forget. I was not that girl anymore, neither would I've ever get so fat again. The wrestler grabbed the Latina around her waist and just hosed her up her shoulders, carrying her away.

As Santana was away, I noticed for the first time the crowd that had formed around us. "Move, now," I ordered. Sometimes being the HBIC had its perks, as everybody cleared away as fast as they could.

Looking back to Berry, I noticed that Brit already made her way over there. The anger made place for her usual soft face, now full of concern. "Rachel, are you okay?" She asked softly, as she put some hair out of the girl's face. Rachel flinched at the contact. "Maybe we should get you to the nurse?"

"No, no nurse." Berry sounded panicked, which was weird. I knew she wasn't afraid of the nurse. After all she had a monthly check-up with the nurse, to make sure she was in the best of her health. Ignoring ones health could lead to bad singing and blah, blah, blah.

"Okay, no nurse." B promised the other girl, while she again put some hair out of Berry's face. "Can you sit up?" The girl just nodded, before trying to push herself up. She yelped as she covered her stomach. "Maybe we need some ice, Quinn?"

I didn't hear my name, as I watched Berry. Her sweater had shifted up a bit, and I saw some traces of a bruise. But that couldn't happen that fast, right? San only kicked her a few minutes ago. "Quinn," the blond said harder this time.

"What," I asked surprised.

"Can you get some ice?"

"Yeah sure," I tore my eyes away from Berry's stomach. Leaving the two alone in the now empty hallway. Classes must have started I realized. Berry was going to freak out, when she found out she was skipping class. I already knew how she would look, before going to ramble about the importance of class. Somehow I thought of it as adorable, before I shook that idea away. Berry and adorable didn't fit into one sentence. I had reached Sue's office, which was luckily empty. I sneaked in and grabbed a few icepacks from Sue's stock, when I got a text message.

**Puck: thnx 2 ZZ S is KO bring her home.**

I wanted to be mad at Zizes for knocking my best friend out. But knowing the rage S had been in, it was probably be for the best. I hurried back to the hallway. I saw a teacher looking at me, but since I am a Cheerio and I'm carrying icepacks, he didn't say anything.

I saw that Rachel had managed to sit upright by now, and B was sitting in front of her. Probably talking about unicorns or her cat, as Rachel was smiling. Or smiling as much as possible, with a split lip, an darkening eye and a very red nose. "Here," I handed B the icepacks.

She smiled at me, before turning back to Rachel. "This is going to hurt a little, okay?" Rachel nodded nervously. Carefully B placed the icepack against the diva's face. I saw her flinch in pain, her hand forming into fists. It took a few seconds before Rachel took the icepack from Brittany.

"Why are you here?" The diva spoke up, she looked at us mistrusting. Well mostly at me, B couldn't even hurt a fly.

"Why wouldn't we be here?" B asked surprised, not knowing why Rachel asked the question in the first place. And since when did I call her Rachel, even in my thoughts.

"Can you just accept things, without questioning them?" I asked, looking the diva directly in the eyes.

She kept staring back, until I looked away. I saw a smile appear again on her face, and somehow I felt happy for making her smile. "No, mostly when people are nice it's a prank. So, why are you here? Why aren't you with Santana, gloating about how she beat up the dwarf." I felt my cheeks turn red, Berry never said anything about our behavior. Always choosing to not let us ruin her day.

"Santana is my friend, but I don't like her right now." Brit gave Rachel another icepack. "For your tummy." It was quite, as Rachel somehow managed to get the icepack on her stomach without revealing her skin again. "Do you really think we would just leave you her after San beat you up?" The hurt in B's voice hearable, that somebody even thought that about her.

Rachel had the decency to look ashamed and stared at the floor. "I never assumed that I was going to be in this position. Even with all the threats and the occasionally shove and slushie facial, I never really had or expected really physical damage while on school grounds. For some reason I considered this school a save place. And for unknown reasons decided that I should stop let other torment me on a daily basis."

"Your talking is back to normal," I joked. Really why did she always have to talk like that. She seemed to want to say something back, but stopped herself. "Let's get you up, before we start drawing attention again." Rachel put the icepacks away and tried to push herself of the ground, only to be falling back. "Need any help? Midget." I don't know why I added it, this was getting to surreal. Me being nice to Berry.

"I'm fine. You can go if you want. I can manage myself from her. Although I would appreciated it if you could tell Mr. Schuester I won't be attending Glee today." During her talk she again tried to get back to her feet, which again didn't succeed. I saw a tear falling down her cheek as she again put her arm protectively over her stomach. Britt just decide to ignore the diva's rant, as she carefully put her arms around Berry's chest, slowly lifting her off the floor.

"I'll drive you home," B stated. "Let's go," she still had one arm around the tiny singer.

"I'm perfectly capable of walking, as well as driving myself home."

"Rachel," B said in her stern voice. The voice that always made it clear not to argue with her. San and I heard it on many occasions. And apparently even Berry understood that sometimes she just needed to shut up.

"You need help?" I asked, not sure what I could do, but feeling like I should do something.

"No, I got it. You just go to class." I watched them walking away, Berry obviously trying to walk without support, making Brit holding her firmer. As they went around the corner I sighed. Packing my stuff, I actually managed to be on time in class. Just something that Rachel had said kept bothering me. Why on earth would anybody ever consider school, especially this school, as a safe place. I tried stop thinking about her, in a week everything was going to be back to normal.

_Santana POV_

I groaned, as the sun shined in my eyes. I didn't want to wake up. I didn't want to go to school. Looking at the clock, I was surprised to see it was late afternoon. Apparently I slept through the whole day, somehow. I felt back on the bed, after trying to sit up. Pain shot through my head. After a few minutes I tried again and I actually managed to sit upright this time. I noticed that I wore my Cheerios uniform, which was covered in slushie. And suddenly it all came back, going to school, Manhands telling me to shut up, throwing a slushie on me. I didn't remember anything after, but my sore knuckles making it clear it had to be true. I beat the crap out the diva. B was going to kill me, I promised her to not pick fights anymore. I let out another groan. I really wanted to go back to sleep, but I'd start make things right.

I sat in my car outside the Berry house for at least ten minutes by now. Trying to work up the courage to walk up that door, being confronted with two dads that were probably hating me and planning to sue me. I should have had a drink before doing this. This was worth breaking my 48 days sober record. I sighed, I'd to face them sooner than later. Finally leaving the car I looked up to the house. It was not right, I couldn't point my finger to it. But it wasn't right. Walking fast to the front door, before I chickened out, I rang the doorbell. I heard some shouting, before the door was opened.

"Can I help you, beautiful." Did Berry's father just called me beautiful.

"I, I'm here to see Rachel." I stuttered, the way the man was checking me out giving me the creeps.

"Rachel come down here," he shouted. Then he smiled at me again. "Why haven't I seen you before?" The smell of alcohol almost make me gag. "Want a smoke?" He offered me a joint. Berry's father offered me a joint. I know they are very free spirited and open minded people, but this really was too much. He didn't wait for my answer as he lit it and brought it to his own mouth.

I heard talking inside, assuming it was Berry's other father. "Is see the one who beat you up today?" I didn't hear Berry's reply, but my heart started beating faster. Surely I would come face to face with an angry father right now. However the only person that appeared was Berry. Bruises covered her face, a black eye, a broken looking nose and a split lip. She looked at me angrily, and I knew she had every right.

"Rach, honey, why don't you bring home sexy cheerleader friends more often." Berry looked ashamed, before walking past her father and close the door behind her, leaving us both outside.

"What do you want?" She asked harshly. Giving me a glare that actually made me shrink.

"I came to apologize, I shouldn't have lost my temper and hit you."

"And because you feel the sudden urge to apologize, you think it's okay to break into my home life, while I certainly didn't ask for your presence around my house. Although it doesn't really surprise me, you were always selfish."

"I didn't mean to be inconvenient. The though never occurred me that my present her was unwanted." I started to ramble like Berry, just something in the way she looked at me, made me feel so insecure.

"It's unwanted. Please don't visit my house ever again. And I appreciated the courage to come apologize." And that's how she left it. She walked back into her house, slamming the door. I saw the creepy dad looking at me through the window, and I hurried towards my car and drove off.

My next stop was Quinn. I was not going to face a disappointed B, before exactly knowing what I did. I texted her that I was outside her house, and a few minutes later she slide into the passenger's seat. Her parents didn't like me, and I didn't like parents, so this was easier.

"What happened today at school?" I asked immediately, not wanting to beat around the bush.

"Don't you remember?" She asked surprised, she never had seen me in real rage. So she didn't know that I hardly remembered anything what happened during those times.

"I remember Manhands throwing a slushie over me, but after that it's black. I know it's bad, I just visit Berry and her face …" I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. I didn't want to cry, not in front of Quinn and not over Berry.

"I'm sure she's going to be okay," Quinn pulled me into a hug. "Why did you visit Berry anyway?"

"Apologize," I mumbled.

"Since when do you apologize?" She asks only half teasing, I barely ever said sorry for anything.

"I might be a bitch, but I know when I was wrong." I saw that Quinn wanted to say something, but I stopped her. I really didn't want to talk about Berry. "Did I hurt anybody else today?"

Quinn started shifting in her seat uncomfortable, and I already knew the answer. The question was who, I kept staring at Quinn until she gave in. "B, you hurt B. She tried to stop you, but you shoved her into a locker."

I hoped she was kidding, but I knew she wasn't. I hurt the person I loved, the only person who cared about me. The one I swore to protect forever, had needed protection from me. Angrily I hit the steering wheel. "Just go to her, I'm sure you can work it out. I must go back, my parents probably wondering where I am." She then surprised by given me another hug. "Don't worry, she'll forgive you.

I watched Quinn walking back into the house, before driving away. I knew my next and final stop, B's house.


	3. Anything to make you happy

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, to answer the question, yes this will end in a relationship with the four girls. **

**Sorry for the wait for this chapter, I'd some trouble with the spanking scene, as I never wrote something like this before. I'm still not really happy with it, so any feedback will be appreciated :D**

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><p><strong>Anything to make you happy<strong>

_Brittany POV_

I slammed the door behind me, after what happened today at school, I just didn't feel like going back. Besides it wasn't like I really learned anything in the classes, with teachers going on and on about boring things. I tried to sneak up the stairs, but my mother came out of the kitchen. "What are you doing home so early?"

"Teacher was sick and Glee is cancelled today." Which wasn't a complete lie, with me, S and Rachel absent Will was probably going to cancel it. However my mum just looked at me with that disappointed look. The look she only gave to me.

"Bridget never skipped school," she stated.

"Bridget the super daughter," I mumbled under my breath. Too bad my mother still heard me.

"I told you before, don't talk about your sister like that."

"I guess I'm just too dumb to remember it." I added angrily, before stamping up the stairs. Really why did she always have to bring up Bridget or Bethany or Breana in every sentence. I looked at the framed picture of me and my four sisters, five years ago. Five happy, blond girls, just having fun. Before mum started comparing us. Or mostly just me against them. I wasn't as smart as Bridget, nor was I former head cheerleader and current youngest regional winning coach like Bethany. And I didn't plan on a marry a nice, rich doctor like Breana had and be a perfect housewife. I retained myself from smashing the frame again, while I continued towards my bedroom. Immediately after I entered I put some music on. I could hear my mother shouting something from downstairs, making me turning up the sound. I didn't need to hear her right now, I was angry enough as it was. Changing in some comfortable clothes I started to dance those feelings away.

It wasn't for a couple hours later that I heard knocking on my door. I knew exactly who it was, S. Only when she messed up she knocked on the door, instead of barging in. Turning the music to a normal volume, I opened the door. S was looking at the floor, her hands in front of her. "Hi," she finally said, looking me in the eye for a second, before she stared back at the floor.

"Hi, come in." I walked to the corner of my room, which contained my bed. I sat against the headboard, waiting for S to join me. She slowly closed the door, before dragging herself to my bed.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, but I pretend not to hear it. She knew I didn't like it when she whispered like that. "I'm sorry," louder this time. As she sat there in silence, shoulders hanging down, it took all my willpower not to scoop her in my arms and never let her go. But I couldn't, not before S was punished for her behavior. So I just stared at here. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I lost my temper, I'm sorry I beat up Berry and I'm sorry I hurt you."

"Why did you do it?"

"I don't know." She seemed to rethink her answer. "Maybe 'cause I didn't expect her to talk back." I nodded for her to continue. "They should have come home today," she softly whispered. I couldn't longer restrain myself and pulled her in for a huge. I could feel her crying already, my shirt starting to get wet. Suddenly she looked up. "We would have two weeks together, before they're going to Brazil for three months. It's not fair. It's just not fair." She laid her head back, continuing with her sobbing. I softly stroked her hair, waiting for her to calm down. I wished I remembered that her parents were coming home today, but the date changed so many times, it was hard to keep track. I don't know how long we sat like that, before I noticed that she had calmed down.

I hated myself for asking, but if the answer was yes, there was going to be a lot of more sorrow and crying. "Did you-"

"No," the proud hearable in her voice. I looked into her eyes, that's how I knew if she was lying. "I really didn't," she defended herself. I could see the truth in her eyes.

"Just to be sure. I'm proud of you." The smile on her face made me love her even more. "I love you," I softly whispered, before kissing her. I felt her deepen the kiss and eagerly reacted. It wasn't until she pulled at the hem of my top, that I pulled back. "No sex, San." She looked at me with those big brown eyes, a pout on her face. "I'm still disappointed in you."

I heard her sigh, "but it was only 'cause I was mad at my parents."

"So you being mad is enough reason to really hurt Rachel." She looked at the floor, nervously playing with her skirt. "San, what did we agree?"

"I can't use my parents as a reason to behave badly." She repeated the rule we decided on a long time ago.

"Good, now get the hairbrush." She quickly stood up and took it from the top drawer. On the way back to the bed she turned the music on again, before locking my bedroom door. After getting the hairbrush I just looked at her, until she took her skirt and panties of. Slowly she laid over my lap, and I ran my hand over her ass.

"Why are you here?"

"Because I picked a fight with Berry and really beat the crap out of here and I hurt you, ma'am."

"That's right," I raised my hand. This was always the hardest part, I just wanted to hold her and tell her everything was okay. I thought back at Rachel, and remembered how she could hardly walk and her face being a mess.

_Santana's pov_

The first slap always surprises me, a sting already coming up. However I don't have time to think about it, as she starts a steady rhythm, setting my ass on fire. I feel tears falling down my cheeks already. Why does she has to be so damn strong, and she isn't even using the hairbrush yet. As she continuous her assault on my behind I start sobbing and squirming. She just holds me firmer, never stopping. "I'm sorry," I say over and over again. I suddenly felt her rubbing my back softly.

"Calm down," she softly whispered. I slowly relaxed. Until I felt her reaching behind her, I knew she was getting the hairbrush. "It's almost over." She waited until I relaxed again, before bringing the hated hairbrush down on me. And again on the same spot, in immediate reaction my hands shot back. She grabbed them and hold them at the small of my back. She always spanked slower with the hairbrush, making sure I felt the impact, the sting and when the feeling sort of faded, bring it all back again. The cycle repeats a few more times, before I hear her laying it on her bed. She start rubbing my back again, waiting for me to get it together. As I start to get up, she helps me to my feet, before whipping away the tears on my cheeks with her thumb. "Corner time," and she softly pushes me away.

About ten minutes late, Britt calls out for me. "You can come out now," I turned around and walked slowly towards her. She handed me my panties and skirt and I quickly put them on. It was only then that I noticed she had already turned the music back to a normal volume. "I want you to apologize to Rachel."

"I already did Ma'am." I noticed the proud smile on her face.

"How did it go?"

"She was kind of mad I came to her house, but she" I made quote marks in the air "appreciated my courage to come apologize."

Before B could say something back somebody kept knocking on the door. B smiled before opening the door, revealing her younger sister Brooke. "Mom says diner is ready."

"Okay, will be down in a minute."

More like five minutes, before she fixed my make-up and it wasn't obvious I'd been crying.

We lay in bed later that night, my hands slowly trailed down B's body, making patterns all up her stomach and still going south. "No sex." Buzzkill, my hands ignored her as they kept roaming her body. "San" the tone alone sounded warning, combined with her hand suddenly on my ass, I quickly put my hands up around her waist and back to just spoon her. "San" that sweet innocent voice, I wasn't going to like this. "I think you should invite Rachel this weekend." I definitely wasn't liking this, no way that manhands was going to ruin my weekend.

"Why?" Knowing that just no was an answer B wouldn't like.

"'Cause she thinks she has no friends and then she's all alone. And then she is sad and then I'll be sad."

I sighed, B had me there, cause if I hated one thing, it was a sad Brit. And it wasn't like Berry would actually wanted to hang out with us. "I'll ask, but I don't think she'll be coming."

"As long as you ask I'm happy." She pushed her body even closer against mine, and I softly kissed her neck.

"Anything to make you happy."

_Rachel POV_

I slammed the door after I left a stuttering Santana behind, never thought I would see the day I would make Santana stutter. I tried to sneak back up the stairs, but a pull at my hair stopped my track.

"Why do you bring cheerleaders to our house?" A slap in the face, he doesn't care right now. My face is already bruised, so no one is going to notice. "You know how your father gets?" Another fist connects and I bit my lip not to scream. He hates it as I scream. "You're doing it deliberate don't you?" A punch to the stomach, I fell on the ground. "You're trying to rip this marriage apart. Another kick. "Get out of my sight." I obliged, glad that it was over for now. I hurried out of the room, before he changed his mind.

It hadn't been always like this, they used to love me, spoil me even. Everything I wanted I got, and we were all happy. One big, loving family. Until they got home one time drunk, dad had slapped me and daddy had just watched. He apologized the next morning, and as I'm a big believer of second changes, I forgave him. Until it happened again, and again and again. Using the addictive substances at home as well. Daddy liked to flirt with everyone when he was taking drugs, and ended up cheating on my dad a lot. Which was of course all my fault.

Sometimes I wondered why I stayed, but no matter how wrong this all was, I still loved my dads and I had hope they would change back. As soon as they finished their midlife crisis and until then a bad childhood would give me a lot of inspiration for songs. And although being just a singer wasn't my dream, it could help me make it to Broadway.

The next morning I didn't even bother putting make-up on, no way I could hide those bruises. I arrived at school early as usual, and spend most of the time in the choir room, practicing my vocal ranges. As I walked towards my locker a lot of people looked at me, some even took pictures. I ignored them. As I got all the books that I needed, I saw them going towards me. Holding pinks as usual. It was so obvious they were in love with each other, sometimes I wondered how no one else picked up on that. I put one of the books back in the locker, pretending to be busy, so hopefully they would ignore me. I didn't want a repeat of yesterday morning, or a talk about my home. But it didn't work, as they stopped at my locker.

"Hi Rachel," Brittany said very cheery. "Are you feeling better today?"

"Under the circumstances I'm feeling okay, thank you." I noticed that Santana was just staring at my face, guilt all over hers. Well she should be, most of it was her doing. "Do you want anything?" I looked from one cheerio to the other. I was pretty sure Santana wouldn't hit me again, not with Brittany standing next to her. Only the blond gave her girlfriend's hand a squeeze before leaving us alone. Now I started to get scared. I was well aware that if she had a go at me again, no one would stop her. I felt my breathing become faster. Her hand on my shoulder, her guilty looking face. The quick removal of her hand as I must have looked terrified.

"I'm sorry, I really am. I won't hurt you." She took a step back. "Should I call B, you didn't freak out when she was here."

I was a strong, confident person, I could do this. I could handle talking to her, without help. I just shook my head. So far for being all confident.

"Okay, I just wanted to ask. And whatever you say I won't be mad. Do you want to come to a sleepover at my house this weekend."

"No," I softly whispered. Closing my eyes, waiting for the hit.

"Okay," I opened my eyes. She just looked at me with sorrow, and was that concern. "Kind of expected that."

"Then why did you ask?"

"I promised B I would ask. Anyways I've got to go." And with that the cheerleader was off. I released my breath. That went better than expected. I'd expected some sort of threat not to tell a teacher what happened, especially after my unpleasent behavior yesterday. Not that I would tell, telling would lead to a discussion and discussions lead to parents coming to school, which lead to me keeping dad and daddy away from their pleasures, which would lead to a lot of pain. I dragged myself to all my classes, ignoring the looks I got and the whispers behind my back. It happened every day, today a little more than normally, everybody seemed to know about the fight.

When I got home later, I actually managed to get to my room, without being spotted. I quickly started with my homework. I started to get behind, which just wouldn't do. I needed a perfect record to get into NYADA. I tensed when I heard footsteps coming up to my room. There was a knock on the door, I relaxed. It was my daddy, dad never knocked. "Come in." He walked in, obviously drunk again.

"Honey, your dad and I are giving a party this weekend. And we don't wanna see you. I don't care if you stay in your room all day, or if you go somewhere, but you're not going to blow this party, got it?"

"Yes daddy."

"Good, love you." He mumbled before leaving the room, he always said that, more out of habit then that he loved me right now. Probably going to drink some more. So they were hosting a party, which really sucked. Mostly they went tp parties on the weekend. And now I had to go away, because staying in my room wasn't going to be good enough. I would do something to upset dad, I just knew. Only I'd nowhere to go, it wasn't like I really had friends at school. Of course we had our little glee family, but I didn't get so well along with the most of them. And I couldn't invite myself to their houses, not without an explanation. And some things I rather didn't tell. I could already hear Santana mock me _even __your __own __fathers __don__'__t __want __you __around._ But that was when I realized I'd been invited to somebody else's place this weekend. It was far from pleasant, and maybe a big prank, but it was the only thing I got. I'd to spend the whole weekend with Santana, Brittany and maybe Quinn. Great.

Despite knowing I'd to ask if I still could come over, I kept postponing it. So that was why at Friday afternoon, after glee, I gathered all my courage and walked towards the unholy trinity. It was her idea from the start, and she wasn't as scary as Santana and if it was just a prank, she would probably tell me. "Brittany, may I speak with you for a moment." The other two gave me a weird glance, before leaving the two of us alone. "I don't know if you know, but Santana invited my over for a sleepover this weekend, and I declined the offer, but I was wondering if I could still come. I totally understand if you say no, or if it was just a prank, and –"

"Stop, you talk to fast." She smiled at me, "you want to come to the sleepover?"

"Yes," I softly said, not really meeting her eyes.

The next thing I knew she gave me a hug. "It's gone be so much fun. We just have cheerios, but if you wait here, we'll pick you up after." And then she bounced out of the room.


	4. Don't ask, don't tell

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews.**

**I wanted to write the whole sleepover in one chapter, but as I finished the first part I decided to post it already.**

**Don't ask, don't tell**

_Quinn POV_

There was an awkward tension in the air. Berry had decided to crash our sleepover, but clearly didn't want anything to do with us. She sat on the far end of the couch, while I sat on the other and San and Brit right next to me in the love seat. Brit had practically bounced onto the field, telling that she was coming. Making San speechless for the first time in her life. And after an awkward car ride, we were all sitting awkward in the living room. I saw San whispering something B, before she went to the kitchen. "And ask for something vegan," the latina added. "I do listen to you on occasion," she told a surprised looking Rachel. "By the way, we've one rule here. It's probably really hard for you, since you like to blab." Berry looked a bit offended, but before she could say anything, S continued. "Don't ask, don't tell. About parents."

"I don't blab, I just have a strong opinion, that needs several arguments to convince people of the right point of view, which of course is mine."

"Blab," S grinned, as Rachel crossed her arms defensively.

"Fine." And back to an awkward, silence tension it was. I looked at Rachel, without making it obvious I was looking. She was once again wearing one of those sweaters. The ones I make fun of all the time, but are actually kind of cute. And she was wearing jeans again, she had started wearing them a few weeks ago. Not that I paid that much attention to Manhands .

"Why don't you wear skirts anymore?" I could bit my tongue, I didn't mean to ask. Why would I ask, it's not like I care?

"I find jeans more comfortable and it stopped Jacob from trying to take pictures under my skirt."

"Creep, do you want me to beat him up?"

"No, thanks," Rachel obviously didn't know whether San was joking or not. "But he's a creep."

"Takes one to know one," Rachel's face immediately fell.

"San," the hurt look at Rachel's, I mean Berry's, face was making me really angry. But only because I wouldn't want this tension all weekend.

"I was joking, jeez lighten up a bit."

"Not funny."

"Wow, you can give short answers."

"Was the sole purpose of your invitation to insult me the entire weekend?"

"No, that's the bonus." They kept glaring at each other. I wish B would come back, how long could it take to order take-out.

"Stop it, both of you." They both fell back in their seat, their arms crossed. "I'm not going to listen to you two bickering all weekend."

"She started it," Rachel mumbled, still looking angry.

"It isn;t my fault that you can't take a joke." They kept giving each other angry glares, both still behaving as mocking little children. Luckily B finally returned, looking at the three of us.

"What happened?" She looked directly at S, who seemed to want to disappear in the chair.

"I was just kidding." B just shook her head, before grabbing S's hand and dragging her into the kitchen. Leaving me and Rachel alone. I saw Rachel looking worried at the door, were the lovers just disappeared.

"I didn't mean to cause trouble. Maybe I ….." Stopping there, I already understood what she wanted to say, maybe I should go.

"Don't worry. You just relax a little bit, and San has to turn down the bitch, and then we will all have a nice weekend. Just accept her apologize." Before Rachel could respond S and B returned.

"I'm sorry I called you a creep, and I'll try not to insult you again this weekend."

"Okay, and I might have overreacted a bit."

I saw that San wanted to say something about that statement, before shaking her head. "We were both kind of idiots."

"I can't really disagree with that." And with that the tension was gone, S and B sat down in the loveseat again. We talked a bit, and surprisingly, Berry was able of not talking in paragraphs.

Then the food came, with a large amount of breadsticks. San really had that manager wrapped around her finger. In the beginning she used to call to say she didn't receive enough, 'cause S loves her breadsticks. The three other girls dug into the food, I really didn't get them. How could they eat so much and stay so gorgeous, while with every bit I felt my body becoming uglier. I noticed Rachel watching me, so I grabbed a breadstick and started slowly chewing on it. The diva seemed satisfied, as she started eating again. Under Rachel's gaze I eat more than I wanted. It felt wrong, I felt disgusting. In this way I would never get rid of this post birth body. I'd to get rid of it, rid of this poison I forced into my body. I excused myself, going to the toilet the furthest away from the other three girls. They wouldn't understand, why would they, they were all beautiful. I quickly emptied my stomach, I was sorts of pro in doing it by now. I felt so much better when it was all out. I took a peppermint for my breath, checked whether I left any traces, before going back.

I heard them arguing about which movie to watch, Berry wanting to watch a musical, S wanting a cheerleader movie and B a Disney movie. I smiled I already knew how this would end, it always ended the same. B would pout at S and then the three of us would watch a Disney. I opened the door, the S and Berry were standing right in front of each other, both with their hands on their sides. "No way I'm watching a musical."

"Fine, we'll watch a Disney. Which with all the singing and dancing is just a musical." I saw Rachel's smirk, before she went to B, who was at the DVD collection.

"Thanks a lot Berry, know I'll have nightmares every time I see a Disney movie from now on."

"You're welcome, and my name isn't Berry."

"It's how I name you."

"Just don't call her Berry," I interrupted. I saw B giving me a smile of gratitude.

"Fine I'll call you Manhands."

"Fine," the diva spat back.

"San," the warning voice of Brit. I saw that S wanted to say something back, but changed her mind. Rachel finally found a movie, put it on and we all settled back to our earlier places. After we watched _the little mermaid, _B insisted we watched part 2 as well. She and S were so cuddled in the loveseat, it was practically impossible to tell which limb belonged to which girl.

"Can you get it Ber-, Rachel?" While Rachel got the other movie, S kept saying Rachel over and over. "It's not right. I don't do first names." She seemed to think for a moment. "Rach, nah, R, no." Shaking her head, I could see her think. "Rae. How do you like Rae?"

"It's nice." Rae, apparently, answered.

After we watched the second movie, S and I convinced B that we didn't have to watch part 3 also. Strangly enough, Berry was silent, but one look told me she already felt asleep. "Look Rachel is already sleeping, let just go to bed."

The blond seemed to think over this. "We'll watch it tomorrow, okay?" S made a compromise. We both look relieved when B agreed. If she made up her mind, it was always difficult to change it. "What should we do with Berry? Leave her, wake her," San asked.

"She's small, you can carry her upstairs." How could B still be so awake, while the rest of us were exhausted. S looked at me, but I just shrugged. So she sighed, before slowly approaching Rachel. Rachel was curled up in a little bal, her arms around her stomach. S slowly tried to put Berry's hand around her neck, but Rachel woke up, with panicked look on her face. She immediately put her knees against her chin and practically hugged her legs.

"Rae, are you okay?"

She slowly looked up, her eyes scanning the room. She seemed to slowly realize where she was. She looked at the three of us. She lowered her legs, "can you stop staring?"

"Are you okay?" S repeated, "you totally freaked out when I touched you."

"Well, you shouldn't touch sleeping people. It's creepy."

"Wanna start about creepy again. You know what, forget it. Next time you fall asleep, I just leave you here." I noticed a small smile on Rachel's face, when she heard next time.

"Sorry, I'd a bad dream. A creepy, bad dream." S glared at her for a minute, before laughing. Which made Rachel laugh as well. As they both stopped laughing, Rachel turned serious again. "Why were you touching me anyway?"

"Because she was going to carry you to the bed, B's idea," I answered

"Beause S and Q are really tired, and don't want to watch the next movie." She actually pouted at Rachel.

"Then we will have something fun to watch tomorrow." B sighed, before giving in. She kind of had to, when it was three against one.

Rae went into the bathroom, while the rest of dressed in the bedroom. Being in the Cheerios we were used to dress in front of each other. I did turn my back towards them, I didn't want to see their perfect bodies, I couldn't compare with them. I didn't have to see it, to know it. I can hear them kissing, and I cough. I might know about their relationship, Rachel didn't. They get my hint and stop, and I know B is pouting again. I turn around as I hear the door opening. The little diva was dressed into sweatpants and a hoodie. "It's cold," she immediately defended. The three of us were just wearing shorts and a tank top.

"Whatever," S murmured, before lying in the bed. I climbed in next to her. I always slept in the middle, just to make sure they wouldn't have sex right next to me. "Come on Rae."

"We all sleep there. Together." Of course Rachel wouldn't want to share a bed with us. There might be some truce right now, but we were not exactly friends.

"Yeah," B said happily, before seeing Rae's facial expression. "You don't want to." And even Berry couldn't say no to a real Brittany pout. She climbed into the bed, quickly followed by B. And even with the four of us, it still wasn't cramp. S really had the biggest bed ever, which she bought after we started our sleepovers all those years ago. I quickly drifted off to sleep. I noticed soft whispers from S and B, Berry turning and twisting next to me. I grabbed her arm and pulled her on top of me, my arms around her waist. She calmed down and I finally could go to sleep.


	5. Posters of Funny Girl

**A/N: So, I finally woke up from my **hibernation** ;)**

**Seriously, I'm sorry for this long wait of five months. I'm a student and had to write my final thesis. But I'm back now.**

**Thanks for all the reviews, story alerts and adding to favorite story. So here is the rest of the sleepover.  
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**Posters of Funny Girl**

_Santana POV_

I woke up when Brit gently kissed me, leaning on her arms to bend over the other two girls. They seemed so cute together. Rae lay on top and had her head on Q's chest, while Q had her arms around the other girls waist. Their legs were intertwined and they both looked happy. It was a long time ago since I saw even one of them looking so carefree. "Aren't they cute?" It was like B read my mind.

"They are," I whispered back. I noticed Rae moving, her breath changing and she snuggled even more into Q. I recognized this as almost waking up, as I seen it a million times before with Q. I couldn't wait till Berry figured out she was all over her biggest enemy. It took a few more minutes, but suddenly her body tensed and she flew of Q, only to bump into B. Priceless, I couldn't help but laugh. Quinn started groaning her arms moving, she obviously missed the diva. I gently pulled her on top of me, and she immediately made herself comfortable, without waking up once. Really a bomb could explode next to her and she would still be sleeping. "She likes to snuggle." I said to Berry who was sitting in the middle of the bed. "What time is it anyway?"

B looked at the clock, then tilted her head to look at it from a different angle. Sometimes I wonder how she could be so smart, but couldn't be bothered with learning 'unimportant' things as reading a clock. "It's 6.30," Rea answered surprised. My head fell back on my pillow.

"You woke me at 6.30."

"But they were so cute, and I wanted you to see them."

"Whatever. I'm gonna sleep again." I heard the two of them getting up, chatting way too much. B finally finding another morning person as Rae tried to teach her how to read a clock.

Four hours later I woke up, when I felt Q stirring. "Morning," she whispered, making no sign of movement. This was normal waking up for us. Q liked to cuddle and always woke up on either me or B. The first time she woke up on top of me, she was embarrassed. When she woke on top of B the next day, she had the same reaction as Berry. She was afraid I would kick her ass for sleeping on my girl. Even though we hadn't been in a relationship back then, Q already knew. Q has always known. "Where is B?" Normally B would wait till one of us was awake, before getting up. Claiming that it was boring to be awake alone.

"She's down with Berry."

This tensed her up a bit. "I forget she was here."

"Well you didn't last night. You were all over each other." I notice her getting red and I smile. She was so easy to tease. "Now get up, before they decorated my living room with posters of funny girl." Q grunts at the idea of moving.

"Did you two just wake up?" I look at the door, seeing Berry standing there, looking appalled.

"We don't all have a morning routine like you do."

"It's Saturday," Quinn says at the same time.

I see that she wants to say something, probably a long lecture about the importance of a morning routine and the bad things about sleeping in. At the end she just shrugs. "Brittany is dancing and asked me to wake you up."

"We were just going to." Q mumbles, as she has once again laid her head on my chest.

"Once I get free of this," I joke, before starting to tickle Q. First she slaps my hands away, but finally she rolls off me, laughing. I jump up on the bed. "Freedom," although it's short lived as Q pulls at my legs, making me fall down on the bed. She just smiles evilly at me. I'm ready to attack Q, when I suddenly realize that Rae is still watching us from the door opening. She looks humored, before leaving the two of us behind. Q and I finally get out of bed and join B and Rae downstairs.

I kept glancing towards B and I know the lust in her eyes must mirror mine. "I'm gonna take a shower." I looked meaningful at B, while gesturing with my head.

"Me too," she announced happily, before grabbing my hand and pulling me upstairs. I saw Q shake her head, with that knowing smile on her face. Berry didn't seem to notice anything about it. As soon as the bedroom door was closed, I pushed B against it and started kissing her. It was way too long since we last did this, yesterday morning. I slowly kissed her neck and was rewarded with a soft moan. I start pulling her shirt up, and only stopped kissing her to pull the shirt over her head. Before I could kiss her again she started attacking my neck, and slowly pushing me towards the bed. I fell on the bed, and she smiled at me seductively, turning me on even more, before getting rid of her shorts and panties. Completely naked, she straddled my hips and continued making out.

"Rachel, NO!" Damn it Berry. I gently pushed B of me, not wanting for Berry to walk into us in such a comprising position. B was laying next to me, looking at me with a pout.

"What Quinn? Why can't I get my bag from the room? And stop saying because."

"You just can't."

"Watch me, I can."

"No wait. I didn't tell you this okay?" Rae probably nodded, as Quinn continued. B had pulled me on top of her, placing kisses on my collarbone, and it took all my willpower not to make a noise. "Brit and San, they're like together."

"I know that."

"You do?" She did? What the hell! How did she know?

"It's that nobody actually looks at them, because it's really hard to miss."

"You're pretty oblivious now. They went to take a shower, together." Q really emphasized the together. There was a stunning silence, I could imagine Berry's facial expression perfectly, I would have laughed if Brit wasn't determined to get me out of my clothes too. "Why do you need your stuff anyway? Going home already?"

"I just wanted some painkillers." Oh crap, that was my fault. I was the one who caused her to be in pain. Worse than I thought, if she still needed painkillers. I stood up and Britt let me go. Eyeing the room I found the diva's bag. It was strategically placed next to the door, grabbing it, I carefully opened the door. B might not have a problem being naked, I certainly had a problem with others seeing her naked.

"Your bag," I said, before handing said item over. The two girls looked at me shocked, and a bit red. Not thinking we would hear them.

"Thanks," Rae quickly said. Holding her bag against her chest. "We just go" Her eyes suddenly looked at the door. "go..." Turning around I saw Brit's shirt lying there. I started turning red myself and that wasn't cool, Santana Lopez didn't blush.

"Downstairs," Q finished for her. Grabbing the other girls hand and dragging her away.

Back in the room I heard that Britt already went to the shower. After putting a chair against the door, just to be sure Berry wouldn't be barging in, I quickly disposed my clothes before joining my gorgeous girlfriend in the shower. She pressed me against the wall of the shower, her mouth attacking mine again. As she slowly kissed down my neck I forget all about tiny diva's and painkillers.

Only one hour later, after we made good use of the shower, my bed and the shower again, before changing the sheets, we made our way back downstairs. Berry and Q also had changed into normal clothes. "We used the guestroom, because I never, never want to set a foot in that shower." I felt myself turn red, she didn't have to point it out like that. I saw that Berry also got red, probably imagining what happened in that shower.

"Please, you so want to join in our morning shower." This made Q turn red also. The only blissfully oblivious was Britt. "So Berry." She shot me an angry look. "Right, Rae, how the hell do you know about me and Britt?"

"If you're trying to hide it you're doing a terrible job at it. But since I wasn't sure you were 'out' yet, I never mentioned it. But you're constantly touching each other and not in a friendly way, and you're very protective of Britt, you always listens when she talks to you, while you mostly ignore the other people around you. And most of all it's all over both your faces, when you look at each other."

Oh my god, are we really that obvious. How did we not pick up on that? How didn't anyone else but Q and Berry pick up on that? We should really try to hide it better. "Whatever" I grumbled back. I didn't do feelings, and I wasn't going to start now.

"Let's do our homework." Only B can make something that boring sound that exiting. We gather our books and sit down at the dining table. Well all of us, except Berry. She grabs some papers and is heading towards the living room.

"Where are you going?" Brit asks surprised.

"To practice my vocal ranges."

"But we're going to do homework."

"That is my homework, for my singing classes."

"But don't you have normal homework. Because you always have to do that first." I smile at Britt, she is the one who insist we always do our homework. And it actually works, I haven't failed a test since.

"I'll do that later." Britt's face falls, sighing in defeat. Well that's not good enough, no one hurts Britt's feelings like that.

"BERRY SIT DOWN AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK." In a record time of five seconds she sits at the table with her books in front of her. She choose to sit at the other side of the table and keeps carefully looking at me. I actually feel ashamed of myself. I know how easily scared she is. I saw it at school, I saw it last night. And still I yell at her. Both B and Q glare at me and the way B looks lets me know I'm in a lot of trouble. However Q surprise me the most as she stands up gathers her books and sits next to Rachel. The girl visible shrinks when Q sits next to her, but after a few seconds she relax a little and starts her homework.

We all work in silence for five minutes, where Rachel keeps throwing glances at me. Looking at me like she's afraid I'm going to yell at her again. I rip a piece of paper out of my notebook and quickly scribble down an apologize, before making it into a little prop and throwing it to her. She carefully opens it, like there is a bomb in there or something. I see Quinn reading with her, and looking over her shoulder as she writes something back. She throws it at me and quickly goes back to work, like she's worried someone will catch her.

I fold out the paper and snigger when I read her response. _Apologize accepted. Never knew the Santana Lopez loved her homework that much._

I quickly write her back. _Almost as much as I love breadsticks._ I notice her smile as she reads it. B also notices and she smiles at me. I also throw her a piece of paper, saying that I'm sorry for upsetting Berry.

_It's okay, I know you're trying. _She writes back, before looking at her chemistry book confused. I place my chair next to hers and look which subject she's one, before I help her. On the other side I see Quinn explaining math to Rae. And it all felt so normal for a moment, like she has always been here. Three hours later B and I are finally finished. Q and Rae already did all their work, and were currently doing Rachel's singing assignment, which mostly was made of Quinn singing, and Berry helping out.

After B started pouting, we all watched _the little mermaid part 3,_ as we all promised her. We decided on a pizza for diner. Mostly I only ordered take-out on Friday, but I couldn't be bothered today. "Don't order for me. I've to go home soon."

"Are you sure? Don't your parents eat like extremely early." I questioned Quinn.

"Yeah, we eat later now."

I ordered the pizza and Q left to collect her stuff. Which was all over the place, as always. I saw Rachel thinking. "What's on your mind?"

"I thought Quinn's dad moved out."

"He did." Q answered, who just walked into the room. "And at the begin of the summer my mom forgave him and he moved back in." She stuffed the last of her books in her bag. "You know you just broke the only rule this house has." Rachel opened and closed her mouth, not sure of what to say. "It's fine. I'm just joking." The moment Q left, the pizzas arrived, speaking of timing. We spend most of the evening just talking, playing games. The only awkward moment was when we all went to bed again. Rachel just stood in the door opening.

"I can sleep somewhere else, you know."

"You can sleep right here."

"Not necessary. It will give you some privacy."

B just looked confused, so I whispered in her ear what Berry really meant. "Don't worry Rae, we already had sexy times this morning." I saw her blushing and I felt myself turn red as well. She slept between me and Britt and she was definitely a snuggler as she was waking up on top of B.

The rest of the Sunday was uneventful, we just played some games, watched some TV and order take out again. Turned out I forgot to do the shopping. At the end of the evening I drove Rae home, her house still had that creepy looking.


	6. Whipped cream

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, story alerts and adding to favorite. It really motivates me to write faster. Also I'm still waiting for response on my thesis, so I've plenty of time.  
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**5. Whipped cream**

_Rachel POV_

I returned home from the weekend, unexpectedly happy. It went much better than I anticipated. My fathers were nowhere in sight and I quick took some food from the kitchen. They were not into cooking anymore and it wasn't really my strong suit. Walking up to my room I heard snoring coming from the master bedroom. Sounds like they had a great weekend as well.

Monday morning went the same as usual, I didn't see my fathers in the morning, but the empty bottles that littered the living room made it clear they had been up. It was unusual that Brittany gave me a hug when I arrived at school and Santana simply rolled her eyes. The rest of the day was rather uneventful, as was most of the week. The girls weren't mean to me anymore, but neither friendly. It wasn't until Thursday that I actually spoke with the Unholy Trinity again. Karofsky thought it would be a great idea to give me a slushie facial. I didn't even notice Brittany coming aroudn the corner,until she was guiding me to the bathroom. "Are you okay Rae?"

"Yeah, it's fine." I started to wash my hair and was surprised when Brit put a chair to the sink and gestured for me to sit on it. I complied, it was nice of her to offer and Santana would give me hell if I didn't obey to Brittany's wishes. Brittany quickly washed the rest of my hair and face, and I must say it's much easier to get rid of slushie with some help.

"Do you've some other clothes with you? You look like an unicorn puked on you." Ignoring that last comment, I looked through my bag, but didn't find any. I realized that I had used it yesterday, when Amizio had slushied me. I sighed, resigning in the fact that I would have to walk around like this for the rest of the day. "You can borrow mine." She pulled an extra shirt out of her bag and took of her Cheerio's jacket. When I didn't' move she grabbed the hem of my sweater. I got over the shock that someone would borrow me clothes. I thanked Brittany while taking the clothes and went in to a stall to change. I put my dirty clothes away. It looked weird on me the Cheerio's jacket, I looked in the mirror a few times. "You look good Rae," Brittany said before grabbing my hand and walking out of the restroom. I felt everybody staring at me.

"Why is she wearing your clothes?" Santana arrived out of nowhere, her arm around Brittany's shoulders.

"Rae got slushied and she didn't have clean clothes."

Quinn also catched up with Santana, overhearing the conversation immediatly asked: "Who?"

"It's fine." I didn't need her to make a scene for me.

"Who?" Santana repeated the question, but her tone was demanding.

"Karofsky." She nodded and than continued to stare at me. "And Amizio yesterday." I looked at her, seeing what she was going to do, but at that moment Brittany visible shivered.

"Let's go find you a jacket B, you'll get sick if you walk around in only that top." My hand went to the zipper, ready to give the jacket back. "You keep that one," she commented, before she dragged Brittany with her.

Quinn smiled and shook her head. "They're going to look in the janitor's closet first." I opened and closed my mouth, not knowing what to say on that. "You get used to it. Let's go to class." We shared the same class and walked together, I felt more people stare at me. It was unusual for me to walk with a Cheerio, let alone wearing part of their uniform. Quinn surprised when she chose to sit next to me, instead of in the back where she usually sat. It was somewhere during the lesson, while I was busy taking notes, that a piece of paper was shoved on my notebook. _Are you coming again this weekend?_

I shrugged and she made another note. _Why not. Don't worry about S, she would like it if you came again._ I didn't really believe that Santana would like my presence there. Last week was obviously an invitation out of guilt. Like she could feel my hesitation she wrote some more, _B would be really happy if you came. _I flipped over her piece of paper and wrote on the back. _If my dads say it's okay, I'll come._ The smile on her face gave me the feeling Brittany wouldn't be the only one, who would be happy with me attending. Of course with the relationship Quinn would feel like the third wheel a lot of the time.

During Glee Mr. Shue told us that the lockers of Amizio and Karofsky had been filled with slushie, destroying all their belongings. He asked if anyone knew anything about it, I glanced at Santana who was filing her nails. When she saw me looking she winked. So maybe she would like my presence after all. After all, you didn't go to all that trouble for a girl you hated, right?

I pulled my shirt a little bit higher, even though it already reached my chin. My dad had been very clear last night that I wasn't to come home again this weekend. There was a small bruise around my neck, where he had hold me. I saw Quinn walking into the school and I quickly followed her to her locker. "Quinn, may I speak with you for a moment?"

"Sure," she smiled, while she took some books from her locker.

"I would like to accept your invitation, if you're sure Santana has no problem with it. I wouldn't want to impose."

"She will be fine. We'll pick you up after practice, same as like last week." She waited for me to nod at the unasked question, before closing her locker and walking away. I didn't see Quinn again, till the end of the day. The Cheerios had an extra long practice, making it impossible for them to be at glee today. I saw Brittany waving at us from the door opening, while Santana impatiently pulled at her other hand. "Change of plans. We'll have to do some shopping, but we can probably hang at school for a bit."

"You were right, you get used to it." It wasn't hard to figure out why Santana and Brittany send us to do shopping. "If you up to it, I know a great vegan store, half an hour away from here. Would that give them enough time."

"That would be more than an hour, they better make it work." Quinn picked up her bag she had dumped on a chair and I hurried after her. Santana's big pick-up truck stood outside.

"How much shopping are we going to do?"

"We switched, my tank was almost empty."

In the car we mostly talked about school and glee, while I gave the directions. We took the time during the shopping and bought more than enough food for two weeks. Quinn paid cash and I saw the large pack of folded bills in her hand. I waited till we got in the car to carefully express my curiosity. "That's a lot of money."

"I know." Was all she said, before driving away. I wanted to know, but I didn't want to upset her with my questions. This was my only option to be away from my home. She sighed and gave me a quick look. "I didn't tell you this." I nodded my agreement. "It's from Santana. Her parents are away a lot for work and this is their guilt money. So she's rich, Bill Gates rich. You know that anonymous donation we got last year for regionals, that was her." I was taken aback with that revelation. I always wondered who the donator was, but finding out it was Santana, that was really unexpected. I also wondered how it was to live with parents who were away often. It didn't sound too bad. "Rachel," Quinn almost yelled and I realized I drifted away. I saw we were close to Santana's house. "Promise me you won't let her know I told you."

"I promise Quinn. I'm an actress, don't worry." Quinn didn't even look assured by this. If she only knew what a great actress I was. We parked and unloaded all the groceries out of the truck. Quinn had a key and opened the door, going straight to the kitchen we were confronted with a living room, where several clothing was spread through the room. Quinn just shook her head and kept walking. Seems like she has seen this before. In the kitchen however came we face to face with Santana, who held whipped cream and chocolate sauce in her hands. She wore nothing but a boxer and she quickly covered her breast with her arms.

We stood there in silence, nobody knowing what to say. Personally I was to shocked to speak. We all unfroze when Brittany walked into the kitchen. She had at least thrown on a shirt and a pair of panties. She gave both me and Quinn a hug, before taking the chocolate sauce and the whipped cream. This shook Santana awake, who almost run out of the kitchen. "You're here early."

"We were away for almost two hours Britt. Two hours. It's not our fault that San doesn't know how to put clothes on."

"You could have rang," Santana came back wearing a pair of sweatpants and a shirt.

"You gave me a key."

"For when I'm not here, and you knew we're home." I ignored the rest of the discussion as I started to unpack groceries, which Brittany's help. The most of it was put away, when Quinn teasingly said, "Besides I don't even want to know why you needed cream and sauce."

"'Cause she was going to eat me for dessert." The stunned look on Quinn's face and the horrified on Santana's make me laugh. Leave it to Brittany to just say something like that.

"You fucking thinks it's funny hobbit?" The atmosphere changed immediately. I tried to keep my face straight, but the concerning look I received from Brittany told me I didn't fool anyone. Quinn gave Santana the angry glare, but Brittany surprised me the most.

"SANTANA, upstairs now." Santana immediately left the kitchen, without a second glance.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." It didn't look like she believed me. I'am sure she and Quinn had some silent communication.

"Can you order some food? I'll go talk to San." She gave me a squeeze on my shoulder before stalking away.

Quinn looked through the take-out folders, before picking one and placing the order. "She doesn't mean it like that."

"It's fine." I wasn't going to make a scene about it. Even though the comment had hurt me the most, especially the loathing in her tone, Quinn and Brittany seemed the most angry about it. Quinn sighed, but unpacked the last of the groceries. Loud music started playing and we both stared at each other. In the living room we couldn't hear it anymore and we watched some TV for a while. When the doorbell rang Quinn opened and took in the food, Brittany came down and helped getting the plates and some forks and knives. We were already eating, when Santana came down, she mumbled a quick apology, before loading her own plate. She sat on Brittany's lap and the two started feeding each other, stopping only when Quinn made a gagging sound. Santana threw a piece of chicken, before continuing feeding Brittany. I notieced that like last week Quinn didn't eat so much. I couldn't get enough, we didn't eat any cooked meals at home anymore, so I took every change I got. Quinn and Brittany decided to watch another movie, while Santana and I were quiet. Despite their best effort the silence tension couldn't be cleared.

When we went to bed I changed in the bathroom again. I couldn't let them see the bruises. They would ask to many questions. When I got out I saw they were already in bed. Santana was at the side again, but Brittany was next to her, spooning her. Quinn was next and I noticed she left some space for me. I climbed in the bed and fell asleep quickly.

I woke up a few hours later, shivering and sweaty. It was nothing new, I woke up like this a few nights a week. When my home life invaded my dreams, or better said nightmares. I quietly went out of bed. "Where are you going?" She scares me and it takes my breath away. I didn't realize anyone was awake. I didn't notice she was getting out of bed, until she was suddenly rubbing my back. "Breath, I'm not that scary, am I?" I shaked, not being able to respond vocaly. Slowly my breathing returned to normal and she stopped rubbing my back. "So, where were you going?"

"Getting a drink." I walked out the room and saw her following me. "You can go back to bed, I'm fine."

"Sure," but she kept walking with me. Once we arrived in the kitchen she made me sit down and got me a glass of water. I drank most of it, while she busied herself in the kitchen. A few minutes later there was a hot cup of soup in front of me.

"You could have gone to bed, you know?"

"Just eat that soup. Please," she added as an afterthought. "You are as white as a sheet and I'm afraid you're going to faint." I tried some of the soup, but it was still too hot. "What were you doing up anyway?"

"Bad dream," I mumbled.

"What, a big bad monster calling you a hobbit?" She asked jokingly, while making a cup of soup for herself.

"Not exactly." Leaving it at that, she didn't need to know what my dream was about.

"I'm sorry, by the way. I shouldn't have got mad at you. I was just a bit embarrassed and took it out on you." She pushed my cup towards me. "Eat your soup hobbit." I could hear the joking in her voice. Still I pretended to be mad and folded my arms for my chest and glared at her. "Think of it as a term of endearment."

"I rather not, thank you very much."

"Yeah, yeah. But you can't deny your little. Una pequeña estrella."

"I'm not little, I'm simply not as tall as you." She laughed at this and we both start eating our soup.

_Una pequeña estrella = a little star_


	7. Angry leprechauns

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, adding to alert and/or favorite :D**

**I noticed some people were curious to what happened, so I added a flashback.**

**Also thanks to my Beta Trustinfaith, who beta'd this chapter for me.**

**6****. Angry leprechauns **

_Brittany's POV_

I woke up with Quinn laying on top of me, but the rest of the bed was empty. I carefully free myself from Q and give her a pillow, which she uses to snuggle with, before going to look for S and Rae. I quickly hear their voices coming from the kitchen.

"You're unbelievable. How can you not know that?" I frowned, it sounded like they were arguing again.

"And they call me a drama queen."

I opened the door and saw San looking through the cupboards, while Rae was on the laptop. "Did you buy anything vegan at all? This is the last time I send you shopping."

"Morning," I gave San a quick peck on the lips. "What are you doing up so early?"

"Making breakfast, as soon as Rae finds the recipe for vegan pancakes." She glared at Rae, who rolled her eyes, and continues searching. "Why don't you go back to bed, we'll call you when it's ready." I look between the two of them, but they seem to be fine.

"Okay," she kissed me again, which started turning into a make-out session.

"Found it," I heard her grunt against my lips. I let out a chuckle and mouthed a 'later', before leaving the two alone. I was to awake to go back to sleep, so I went to the bathroom. It surprised me how well the two of them got along, especially with the way things started.

* * *

><p><em>"You invited her. You can't just invite people Quinn, its my house. I don't want to spend another weekend with the midget. Tell her she can't come." Santana says.<br>_  
><em>"Come on San, last week was fine. She seemed happy that she could come again." Quinn replies.<br>_  
><em>"That's because it doesn't have any friends." Santana counters with.<em>  
><em><br>I decided that it was time to step in. "Tell Rae it's okay for her to come," I say, while giving San my stern look. Quinn looked between us, but when San didn't say anything she lefted the two of us alone. "You don't have to overreact like that. You had a good time last week, and you don't have to act all badass with us."  
><em>  
><em>"I just think it would be more fun with the three of us." She sort of defended herself. She sighed, "fine, Rupaul can come."<br>_  
><em>"Stop the nicknames San. I don't want to hear them at all during the weekend, understood." I say sternly.<br>_  
><em>"Yes ma'am." Was her reaction making it clear that she knew exactly how I meant it.<em>

_"You fucking think it's funny hobbit?" Santana shouts.  
><em>  
><em>"SANTANA, upstairs now." I turned to Rae. "Are you okay?"<br>_  
><em>"I'm fine." It was obvious she wasn't fine and I looked at Quinn, she nodded almost unnoticed that she would make sure Rae was fine.<br>_  
><em>"Can you order some food. I'll go talk to San." I asked Quinn.<em>  
><em>I quickly walked up to the bedroom, where Santana was fidgeting on the bed. She looked up when I closed the door and put a chair in front of it. "Do you know why I'm upset with you right now?" I ask.<br>_  
><em>She stared at her hands, which were on her lap. "Because I insulted Rae." She was silent for a moment. "I didn't mean it like that."<br>_  
><em>"That's because you don't think before you speak. Which we talked about before." The way she didn't look at me, made it clear she understood and agreed. "Go grab the hairbrush."<br>_  
><em>"Now?"<em>  
><em><br>"Yes, so you won't repeat that mistake again anytime soon." She gave me the pleading look, but I learned already that giving into that look, mostly warranted even more bad behavior._  
><em>She sighed before going to retrieve the hairbrush, in the meanwhile I put on the music. Without being asked too she took off her pants and boxer and gave me the hairbrush while I sat down on the bed. She looked over the chair by the door, judging whether it would hold out unwanted visitors, before laying over my lap. I started slowly, working up a steady rhythm, making the spanks harder gradually. She started squirming and I fastened my hold on her. I stopped with the hand spanking when her ass had a dark red color.<em>  
><em>I softly rubbed her back, waiting till her sobs slowed down. "Tell me what names you couldn't call Rachel anymore."<br>_  
><em>"Hobbit," I let the hairbrush come down.<em>  
><em><br>"Manhands," again the hairbrush hit her behind._  
><em><br>"Midget." again I bring the hairbrush to her behind._  
><em><br>"Dwarf." And again._  
><em><br>"Rupaul." And again._  
><em><br>"Yentl." And again._  
><em><br>"Treasure Trail." Hitting the some spot as the last time, making San to cry out in pain._  
><em><br>"Berry," I paused, it wasn't really an insult.  
><em>  
><em>"Anything else?"<em>  
><em><br>"No. Don't think so," I thought it over, but I couldn't come up with anything else either. I laid the hairbrush down, and began comforting San._

* * *

><p>Once I got out of the shower, I decided to check up on them. Those two could change from happy ducks to angry leprechauns in a matter of seconds. They didn't notice me walking in. San was teaching Rachel how to flip a pancake.<p>

"It's hopeless." Rachel let the pancake fall next to the pan again.

"It's all in the wrist." San took the other pan, shaking it lightly and threw the pancake in the air, where the it flipped and fell perfectly in the pan.

"Show-off," I heard Rachel complain softly, before trying it again.

I decided to let them know I was here. "How is it going?"

"Good, although I can't promise about the taste. It's vegan after all." San says.

"There is nothing wrong with vegan." Rae replies.

"You didn't even know a recipe. You've never eaten it before, so you can't say it tastes better or worse." She points the spatula at Rachel, while waiting for the reply.

"If they don't taste good it's not a indication of vegan food, but of your cooking skills." Rae mumbles.

"I love San's cooking." Time to break this argument, seriously they could go on for hours, no doubt about it. San gives me a quick kiss, before looking triumphantly to Rae. We quickly bake the rest of the pancakes.

"I shall wake Quinn." Rae says.

"NO," San shouts out, while I already step in front of Rae. "I'll go." She quickly leaves, giving Rachel no time to argue.

She looks at me for an answer." Quinn can have a bad temper, when waking her up." There is no need to further explain as Quinn's voice fills the air.

"FUCK S. Let me sleep!" We hear, "You want to know where you can stuff your breakfast." It was silent for a moment, before San came back.

"She'll be down in a few." Me and San put down the plates, while I told Rae to sit down. We just put a pancake on each plate, when Q entered the room. Her hair was exploded and a frown was on her face and she had an aura of don't talk to me. So we all ate in silence, waiting for Quinn to wake up. After only two pancakes, she put her plate in the sink and left the room.

"I'll never question your cooking skills again." Rae managed to mention, between bites.

"Whatever," San played it down, but I could see how happy she was with that compliment. After my fifth pancake I decided to check on Quinn. She wasn't in the bedroom, which surprised me, I was for sure she went back to bed. Walking around the house I crossed San and Rae again, who were putting the dishes in the machine. Together. Without fighting.

Also being curious to were Quinn went, they helped me search. I finally found her first, in the bathroom the farthest away from the kitchen. It sounded like she was throwing up. Opening the door, I saw her hanging over the toilet. Before I could react San was standing behind me, one look at Quinn, smelling the vomit made her cover her mouth, before running away. I was torn what to do. I wanted to follow San, but couldn't leave Quinn either. Rae passed San and took one look at the situation. Before she sat down behind Quinn and rubbing her back. I ran after San, finding her throwing up as well. I held her hair, while making circles on her back.  
>I know it relaxed her. When she was only dry heaving, I softly pulled her to her feet. Flushing the toilet I guided her through the house, to the living room. Quinn was already sitting on the couch. If I hadn't seen her throw up myself, I wouldn't have expected it. She seemed just fine.<br>Sitting down next to her, San clang to me and I softly stroke her hair. I know how much she hated throwing up. Rachel came in the room with two cups of tea. She handed one to Quinn and I gave me one to pass to San.  
>We watched some TV together and I convinced San to eat some toast, Quinn didn't want any. Normally we would do our homework by now, but San was drifting off, but acted like she wasn't about to fall asleep.<p>

"Go take a nap." I whisper to her.

"I'm fine." She replies.

"You're almost falling asleep, and you were up early this morning." Q huffed at this, still not appreciating we woke her before ten o'clock.  
>San nodded, before slowly going upstairs, to which Quinn immediatly followed her . I looked at Rae, expecting her to want to sleep some more as well. Her and San were up before dawn after all. She just lay down on the couch and continued to look at cartoons. She reminded me of my little sister, they were both small and they both hated to go to sleep after a bad dream. "I'm gonna move you now," I warned Rae, before I half lifted her off the couch, before sitting down and putting her head in my lap. She moved around a bit, before finding a good position. I played a little with her hair, "You're safe."<p>

"What?"

"From your bad dream." In less then ten minutes she was asleep also.

I felt someone nudging me, opening my eyes I saw San. I realized I must have fallen asleep also. Rae was still sleeping. "Q already left. Her parents called." I glanced at the clock. "It was already past eight. I'll cook some dinner." She played a bit with Rae's hair. "Pequeña estrella." The girl looked adorable. San left for the kitchen and I nudged Rae.

"No, sleep," she mumbled, while slinging her arm over my lap, making sure I wasn't going anywhere. I smiled at that, before trying to wake her up again.

"Rachel wake up." I softly shook her. She immediately tensed up and I let go of her shoulder. "Rae?"

She slowly moved to sit up straight, while looking around. When she realized she was on the couch at San's place, she looked at me "Did we sleep all this time?"

"Yeah, San is cooking diner." She still didn't look complete awake, and I'm sure if she lied down she would be sleeping again. "Why don't you go freshen up." She agreed and went upstairs. I stretched a little, sleeping while sitting was not good for my muscles. Of course stretching let to moving, which led to dancing. Suddenly I noticed San looking at me. "How long have you been standing here?"

"Not long enough," she gives me a quick kiss. "Dinner is ready." We eat some rice and vegetables and those weird vegan eggs, which don't taste too bad actually. After dinner we watched some movie, at the end San was quietly crying, while trying to hide it. It wasn't something new, she always cried easily. Rae noticed it too, but acted like she didn't. Since we were all really awake we played some board games.

The next day was just like last Sunday, except we had to do our homework as well. After dinner San took Rae home again. I wanted to go with them, but they both agreed that it wasn't necessary, just like last week. Obviously they were hiding something from me, I would ask San later when she got back. When she came back, we started to make out. Clothes were once again littering the floor when I stopped. She looked surprised, till I whispered in her ear. "You still got to eat your dessert."


	8. Move it, lose it

**A/N: First off, thank you for all the reviews, adding to favorite and alerts. They give me real motivations to write.  
><strong>

**Sorry about the delay. I'm officaly finished with my uni, just have to get my degree. So with all this free time, I picked up some extra shifts at work, which is why I'd a lot less time to write.  
><strong>

**But it's the longest chapter ever and almost twice the size of the last one :D  
><strong>**  
>This chapter hasn't been beta'd, because I just wanted to post it after the long wait.<br>****  
>In case you think, wow that movie sounds awesome, not likely :p, I just want you to know it's not a real movie and I made the whole thing up.<br>****  
>Please leave a review<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>7. Move it, lose it<strong>

_Santana's POV_

I looked around the cafeteria again, but no sign of Q. B told me about her observation Saturday and asked me to look out. Of course I wanted to confront Q right away and ask her if she made herself sick, but B wouldn't let me. She said it would scare Q and then we wouldn't be able to help at all. So I went with the Rachel Berry attack. I made a list. Speaking of Rae, she wasn't in the cafeteria either. B was sitting next to me, making patterns on my hand. We both ignored the chatter of the Cheerios around us, it wasn't anything interesting anyway. I glanced at the glee table and saw Kurt, Mercedes, Tina, Mike and Blaine sitting there. I wondered why Berry wasn't with them, they're sort of her friends. Q made her appearance and sat across from us. "You're late."

"Coach wanted to talk with me."

"About what?" I wasn't going to let it go this easily. It had become my business to know all about Quinn's business.

"Nothing actually, you know coach. Complaining about Mr. Shue, insulting everyone, complain even more about Mr. Shue." I remembered the conversations I'd with Sue while being Head Cheerleader, it was indeed how most conversations went.

"Did you already eat?"

She is silent for a moment, before going in defense. "What is with all these questions? Are you practicing for when you become a cop." Some of the cheerios looked our way and I didn't want to draw attention.

"Forget it Tubbers. Last time I'll pretend to be interested in your pathetic life."

"How kind of you Bettie Boop." I clench my fist, she knows how much I hate that nickname. I hate that I'd surgery. Not that I didn't like the outcome, be realistic, my boobs were fantastic. No I hated that I just did it to shock my parents, but they didn't even questionned it, while signing the approval papers. B was really disappointed that I actually went through with it. Now she keeps making patterns on my fist, waiting for me to let go of my anger, while Q just stands up and stalks off.

The other Cheerios are staring at me as well. "What!," I bark at them and if I wasn't this angry I would have laughed at how fast they turned around and pretending they never even looked our way.

"Let it go," B whispers, knowing that my anger is towards my parents and not Q. "Come on," she stands up and I follow her, a little smile as I see she's going towards the janitor's closet. I've great memories of this place. I stop in my tracks as I see some new kid with a slushie in his hand, heading for Rae. I'm closer to her and in a few big steps I'm in front of her, I see B catching up with me.

"Give me," I order. I see some fear in his eyes, he already knows who I am. He quickly gives it to me, but isn't prepared for when I throw it back in his face. "You better tell everybody that Rachel Berry is off limits. If there is so much as a drop of slushie on her, I hold you responsible." He gulps, before nodding. "Now move it." He runs away, afraid of my wrath.

"Thank you Santana."

"Whatever. Are you coming this weekend? This one ditched me?" I heard B humph for being referred to as a this one, but I knew she wasn't upset about it.

"Thank for the invitation, I will try to be there."

"Good. If someone bothers you tell me, I'll sort it out. Now Brits and I had things to do." I pulled my girlfriend with me into the janitors closet. Rae shakes her head, the same way Q does. Once in the closet I kiss her hungrily, before slowly kissing her jaw line, working towards her neck.

"I'm proud of you San?"

"What for?" I asked in between kisses, my hands busy with getting under her cheerios top. Why are these stupid tops so tight.

"For inviting Rachel. Without me or Q pushing you."

"Yeah." I finally managed to get under her top and was busier playing with her breasts than engaging in conversation right now. I loved the little moan when I pinched her nipple. She places her hand on her top over my hand, stopping it's movement. "I'm really proud of you."

Sensing that Britt doesn't want to let this go, I've no choice then saying something. "She needs it as much as we do." It's said quickly, before I attack her neck again, determined to leave a hickey.

"What do you mean?" I silenced her with a kiss, she was talking why too much. My hands finally let go of her breasts, only to disappear under her skirt. I went on a teasingly speed going higher up her thighs, to where she needed me the most. "San, talk to me." She softly pushes me off her. "If we talk now, we've more time later. Much more time then a quickie.

"I want a quickie. You want it too, I can feel it." When she removes my hands from her thighs, I actually pout, but she doesn't give in.

"Why does Rachel need it? Why don't you want me to go to her house. Why doesn't she let me go to her house? That one time I drove her home, she made me drop her off at the corner of the street. And I know you know why?"

I sigh, I know B won't let this go. But I can't tell her that Rae's fathers are alcoholic drug users. She would go over there with the twelve step program, but some problems she couldn't fix. "I can't tell you. It's Rae's life and it's her choice to tell. I just found out by accident."

"Okay, but if you want to talk about it, you can. She doesn't have to know you told me." She gave me a quick peck. Preparing to leave the closet, but I pulled her back. "San, we've to go."

"I'll make it real quick." I promised, just as we heard the bell.

She gave me another kiss, before opening the door. "I'll be thinking about you for the rest of the day." I felt myself get even wetter with that comment. _Fuck my life._ I hit the wall frustrated, before following her out.

* * *

><p>It was Friday and I waited impatiently in the choir room. Both B and Q both had gone home, having family things to attend this weekend. I looked at the music on the piano, it looked like her music sheets, but why wasn't she here. I stopped my musing when I saw her entering the choir room. "You're here already." But I didn't respond, I was too busy looking at her outfit. She didn't wear that this morning and there was only one reason to change her clothes. "Shall we go?" She started packing her stuff.<p>

"Who slushied you?"

"It's not important." I wanted to disagree, but she held up her hand. "Although I appreciated your willingness to protect me, I will not have you beat people up for my sake. And it wasn't really his fault anyway, I'm pretty sure the jocks made him do it."

"Fine, I won't beat anyone up." Didn't mean I couldn't go pay them back another way, no one messes with Santana Lopez and gets away with it. "Now hurry up, no need to be at school longer than necessary." She quickly picked up the rest of her music sheets, before following me out of the school.

"Santana, you said you wouldn't do anything. So can you please stop your evil scheming."

"My what?" How did she know that I was thinking at ways to get back at the jocks. And I only said I wouldn't beat them up, personally.

"Evil scheming. I recognize that face."

"You're no fun." I decide to let it go for now, it's not the best start of the weekend if we already had a fight over this. And I promised Britt that we wouldn't fight, too much. "I didn't recognize some of your music."

"You looked through my music." I couldn't decipher whether she was happy, angry, upset or what. "I wrote some myself, but you don't have to tell me that they suck. Finn did that already."

'Cause Finn is the expert on sucking. Let me hear them." She thought it over, but I knew she was going to decline. "I won't make fun of it, I promise."

"I guess I could sing it again."

"Great." I parked the car. "Let's hear it." I led her through the house, towards the basement. I might have overcompensating the absence from my parents by the Glee competitions, but I didn't mind. Not every teenager could say they had a music room at home, with two guitars, a bass, a piano, the drums, a few flutes and a violin.

Rae is silent for a few seconds, looking around. "Santana Lopez, you're unbelievable. I've been here for two weeks and you never mentioned this."

Her reaction is different from normal. Most people ask what my parents do, or which bank I robbed. However she isn't surprised by the expensive stuff in my basement, only by the fact I didn't share this with her before. This only led to one conclusion. "Quinn told you, didn't she?"

"Sant—"

"She told you about the money my parents give me, to make up for that they are never here, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did." I'm going to kill Q. What part of don't tell anyone, didn't she understand. "May I?" She looked at the piano. I gestured for her to go ahead. I really tried to hold back my laughter, the moment I realize that she's singing about a headband. "You promised you wouldn't make fun of it."

"But it's a funny song."

"I guess. But the other one is pretty emotional. If I was prepared for this performance, I would have brought a box of tissues. Even though Finn didn't need them at all. It's called an Only Child," she said before she started singing.

She looked up at me, waiting for my reaction. I could understand it completely, the feeling not to be alone. Someone to share your life with, who completely understand your life and would always have your back. "Screw the headband, this stuff is brilliant."

"Really? Finn didn't like it."

"Don't ever mention Finn again in this house. He doesn't know shit." I hated that she put him on a pedestal, always wanting his opinion. "And that's a rule. Now let's order some food."

We made some small talk, ate our food and I even let her pick a movie. I tried to hide me disapproval when she came back with _Silent Scream_. "Is this okay?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be." I was badass, I was not scared for a horror movie. I simply preferred the Disney movies I watched with Britt. We settled on the couch, both at the side. It already started to get dark outside. There was only one thing worse than watching a horror, watching a horror movie in the dark.

"We can watch something else." We were watching for only ten minutes and I just closed my eyes. "You obviously aren't enjoying this, so we will watch something else."

"We watch this, now shut up and watch." I pointed at the TV, seeing someone being beheaded. I tried not to cringe as the head rolled away, leaving a trail of blood. We both watched the movie again, well Rae watched I tried to pretend I was watching.

"Oh, this is ridiculous. I'll put on something else." I looked up, she paused the screen just as a blade came out of the hot girls chest. When Rachel went to stand up, I noticed I scooted over the couch and was sitting almost against her.

"I said we'll watch this. Now watch it."

"No Santana, you're clearly not comfortable with these kind of movies."

"I'm not scared. Now sit down and watch the rest."

"Are you certain? I have no objections to watching something different."

"We'll watch this." She sighed, before continuing the film. I closed my eyes as the blade started cutting her body in half. I didn't even notice I'd came even closer to Rachel, till I felt her arm around my shoulders, while my head was on her lap. I looked up as she looked down, guess she didn't notice it as well. She started to let go of me, when I grunted "move it, lose it." I saw a small smile on her lips as she put her arm back. We continued watching the movie.

"Hi," the voice startled me, just as the scream that followed. I shot up straight, panting. As Rae looked at me, I could only assume I was the one that screamed. Suddenly I was grabbed from behind and I let out another squeal. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you." The voice of B made me relax and I leaned into her, turning around to give her a full hug. I saw that Rae tried to hold her laughter. "I thought you hated horror movies, 'cause you're a hot cheerleader alone at home."

"She hates it, she's just to proud to admit it."

"Am not." I mumbled against Britt's neck, I never let go of her after the hug. She was just too damn comfy, I wasn't scared because of some stupid movie. "We can watch the rest." I am sure that Berry and B had some silent communication, before they started the movie again. They watched the rest of the movie, while I almost fell asleep, safe in Britt's arms. I guess I must have fell asleep as I feel B carrying me upstairs and lay me on the bed. As she wants to stand up I pull her back down, for a little kissing. I was going to miss this the rest of the weekend. I stopped at the sound of the shower turning on, but since Rae gave us enough time. B and I made good use of it.

* * *

><p>I woke up from a whimper. It took me a second to see what was wrong. Rae seemed to have another nightmare and was beating B with her fist, which B tried to grab. I quickly encircled her arms from behind and pulled the tiny body against mine. She let out another whimper, before slowing down a bit. "Are you okay?"<p>

"Yeah, is she?"

"Think so." It took a few minutes, before she completely stopped moving and just sleep. B came closer and put her arm around my waist, putting Rae in a human sandwich between us.

We managed to get a few more hours of sleep, before my alarm went off. Happily it didn't wake Rae. I softly shook B. Who was very awake immediately, really I had no idea how she did that. "Do I've to go already?" She pouted, but I couldn't give in. I had to bring her back, before her parents would notice that she sneaked out. We quickly dressed. "I can walk, you don't have to drive me."

"No way you're going by yourself at 4.30. I'll drive you."

"But then Rae is all alone."

"She'll survive half an hour alone."

"Where are you going?" I put my hand on my chest, trying to get my breathing back to normal. She scarred the shit out of me. I'd no idea she was awake.

"I'm just going to bring Britt home, you just sleep." I pulled the covers up and tugged her in.

Once in the car I ask her what I've been wondering about since last night. "How did you come here?"

"I walked silly."

"How?" I knew she walked and I knew I wasn't going to like the answer. The moment B started giving vague answers, she knew I wouldn't like it."

"The park."

"The park Britt. How many times have I told you not to go through the park? It's not safe, especially not in dark."

"I'm sorry. I keep forgetting it, I just want to be with you as fast as possible. And when I'm almost at your place, I remember I should've taken the long way."

"Maybe I should find a way for you to remember."

"Do you wanna try it again?"

I knew immediately what she meant by it. "Maybe."

* * *

><p><em>"It's not okay San."<em>

_"I said it was. I forgave you, so let it go."_

_"But it's not right. If you talked to me like that, I would have you over my lap right now." I knew she was right and it was obvious she was steering the conversation in a direction. But if she wanted me to punish her, it had to be her idea._

_"So?"_

_"I think you should punish me." There she said it. I nodded, she was right, I should._

_"What for," I tried to say in the strict voice B always used on me in this situations._

_"For taking my anger out on you and making nasty comments about your insecurities."_

_"Alright, come over here." I patted my lap. I couldn't believe I was actually going to do this. But she needed this and frankly so did I. I'd forgiven her, but the things she said I couldn't forget. Maybe this would bring us both closure. While in my thoughts Britt already was naked from the waist and was currently trying to get comfortable on my lap. I helped her, before raising my hand. I couldn't believe I was actually going to spank B. "Are you sure?" I gave her the final chance to back out._

_"Yeah, but if you aren't-"_

_"No I'm good." I let out one last breath, before letting my hand go down. And soon the room was filled with flesh to flesh sounds. That was also the only sound, B didn't utter a sound or squirmed or tried to move away. My arm started to get tired and there was a little stinging feeling in my hand, and B's ass was a light pink. Maybe I did something wrong._

_"San," her voice got me out of my musing. "You must do it harder."_

_"Okay," it was the same thing I thought about. When I spanked her again, she let out a small "ow", probably surprised about the force behind it. I started again with a rhythm, but harder this time. The color was changing to a darker pink, and she was squirming. Suddenly I heard a small sob and I stopped. "Corner time." B gave me a strange look, before standing in the corner. We didn't even used the hairbrush, but I couldn't. Not when I heard that._

* * *

><p>During my flashback, I drove us all the way back. And after some kissing and saying I love you's, I watched her climbing up the tree and go through her sister's window. I waited till the window was closed, to start driving back.<p>

At home I wasn't surprised to find Rae in the kitchen, eating some fruit. I convinced her to go back to bed, and she was asleep again within minutes. I just couldn't. I grabbed some paper and started working on that song of her.

So when she awoke again, I practically dragged her towards the music room, told her to sit down and got my guitar. I tried a few different cords, before settling on the ones I liked.

_You've got just one egg,_

_You're not going to make an omelet._

_Flying just one way._

_You're not going to make a jet set._

_Sister, brother, wherefore are thou?_

_No need for bunk beds in my bedroom now._

_Oh damn you dads. Why did you settle for only me._

_I'm an only child, more than enough for them, but not enough for me._

_Only child_

_Only child_

_Only child_

_The only Berry on my family tree._

This was the part I was the most worried about. I wasn't really a songwriter like her.

_A kid with too much toys for one,_

_But dreams about sibling already gone._

_No big or little sis,_

_To tell about my first kiss._

_No big bro for me to have teased,_

_But still hit my bully's if I plead._

_Oh damn you peeps. Why did you settle for only me._

_I'm an only child, far too much for them, but not enough for me._

_Only child_

_Only child_

_Only child_

_The only Lopez in da house._

I looked up at her stunning look, her mouth open, clearly not expecting that. As the silence continued, I got a bit uncomfortable. "So what do you think?"

"It's great, awesome, I love it." I felt myself smile at her words, I loved it too. Now she was over her shock, she kept talking about the difference between the piano and the guitar and how well our voiced would fit together. We sang it a few more times and it ended with me teaching her how to play the guitar. Overall we'd a great day and we even managed to do our homework, because I promised Britt I would make it. It was almost enough to make me forget what day it was tomorrow.

After we made our homework, I forced myself to talk to Rae about something that was bothering me for some time. "Rae, are you dads drunk a lot?" The way she looked away told me enough. "Look if you ever want to get away, you can come here okay? Every day, not just the weekend."

It took only a few seconds, but it felt much longer, before she answered. I worried I'd crossed some line, after all I told her she couldn't talk about parents, and I brought it up myself now. "Thanks, but the rest of the week they like the pretend they are parenting, so I've to be home. Just when they have their weekend parties, they prefer me staying somewhere else." I opened my mouth to ask more about it, but she beat me too it. "Can we not talk about this anymore. I liked your don't ask, don't tell rule actually, even when I like to blab.

Rae managed to burn the rice, I mean seriously, who burns rice, so we ordered take out again. We watched some comedy, all the while she kept teasing me about the horror movie. She didn't shut up, till I threatened to turn her into a horror movie. I waited till she was asleep, to get up, waiting for the call. They always seemed to forget the time difference, that, or they didn't care.

"Hey baby girl, happy birthday." My mom said, the moment I picked up. I heard the phone being passed to my dad.

"Happy birthday mija. I put some money on your account, so go out and buy something nice for yourself. We don't know what a girl you age want." I just want you home for my birthday for once. "We're sorry we couldn't make it home, but we bought you a ticket to Brazil. So we can see you."

"We love you," my mom was talking again. "We've to go now, the conference is about to start." And with that they hung up. I realized I didn't say a word, that they didn't ask me how I was feeling. I was just a compulsory phone call. Was it too much trouble to be home at my birthday for once, just one time. In my anger and sadness I didn't consciously open the bottle of whisky, but it tasted too good to stop.

* * *

><p><em>Brittany POV<em>

I woke up from the sound of my phone. The caller ID said it was San, but it didn't sound like San. This voice kept rambling on and on. "Rachel?"

"Yes," she sounded irritated. "Just come outside, Santana needs you." I quickly climbed out the window and down the tree, careful not to wake Brooke. We shared her room, because Breana and her husband were in my room. They were also the reason I couldn't go to San this weekend, because mom wanted us all to have a family weekend. Rae had come in San's car and I silently stepped in. She drove off right away."

"So what happened?"

"She got a call in the middle of the night, and when she didn't come back to bed, I started looking for her. She was drinking whisky from the bottle and I didn't know what to do?"

"You did the right thing." I assured her. We reached the house quick and I was through the front door, before Rae had time to put off the motor. On the couch was S sitting, an almost empty bottle in her hand. I took the bottle from her and pulled her in for a hug. Any moment the waterworks would start and she didn't disappoint. She cried against my shoulder, while I held her. I had been worried this would happen and I wished I'd been here tonight, to stop this from happening. To stop her before she reached that bottle. When she finally stopped, I let go of her. "What did they say?"

"Same as every year. Money on the account, sorry they couldn't make it. I bet they're not sorry at all. I hate them."

"You don't."

"I hate that I don't hate them." She slurred a bit. "Why is there a hobbit?" She looked at Rae. It didn't even sound insulted, more like she really wondered about that. It made me wonder how drunk she really was.

"That isn't a hobbit, it's Rachel. Rachel Berry."

"No way, Rachel is way too tall to be a hobbit. That is a hobbit. Because it's the only thing standing still on a moving world." She looked deep in thought and the look on Rae's face told me she found it all very funny. "Do you think Sam can save me? He saved Frodo."

"Sure," I motioned for Rachel to come closer, so she could sit next to S. She looked a little scared now, especially when I tried to stand up. I kept sitting and she relaxed. San was holding onto her for her dear life, while mumbling against Rae's shoulder. None of us understood what she was saying.

"Does this happen often?" I didn't know how to answer that question. Yes it had happened on a regular basis, but no, not anymore.

"Not really," I kept it vague. Not sure how much San wanted her to know. "She mostly just want someone to hold and cry to." We sat like this for some time, before San finally stopped talking and drifting away. I helped her too bed, while Rae got some water for her.

"Don't want," she swatted at the glass.

"It's a special hobbit drink, it will really help you." Rachel said. I saw San's eyes lit up and I helped her drink it. Rae handed me another drink, which S also drunk happily. After that I tucked her in, and promised that Sam the hobbit would stay with her.

Rae offered to bring me back, but I told her to stay and that I would drive myself back. I would pick them both up on Monday, to which she agreed. I even saw some relief on her face. I drove home quickly, and was halfway up the tree, when the front door opened.

"Brittany Susan Pierce, you come down right now." Busted, I groaned, before sliding down the tree and walking towards my mother. "Where have you been?"

"Just wishing Santana a happy birthday."

"In the middle of the night, what were you thinking? With all the things Bethany did as a teenager, she never sneaked out to say hi to her girlfriend."

"Bethany had a girlfriend?" I couldn't stop myself from saying that.

"Upstairs right now miss." My mom couldn't laugh about it. "You're not to come out of your room until I come to get you." She held out her hand and I gave her my phone, before quietly making my way upstairs. I wish I could tell her the truth, but I knew it wouldn't do no good. She already didn't like San, put that together with an abandoned recovering alcoholic and she would forbid me to go there ever again. I always had the feeling nothing I ever did was good enough for her and I couldn't wait till I turned eighteen and could live with San.

The rest of the day I was completely bored. I was allowed to go to the bathroom, but otherwise I'd to stay inside Brooke's room. I made my homework, did some dancing with my eardrums in. Brooke brought me dinner, and when she had to go to bed I was finally allowed to leave the room. I'd convinced her earlier to send San a text, saying I lost my phone. I really wished I could have stayed with her today.

I said my goodbyes to Bethany when she left. I had hardly seen her this weekend, and I didn't even care. She was too much like my mom, always judging people. Her husband I did like, he was a nice man, who always made me and Brooke laugh and played games with us. He gave me a quick hug and whispered he left something in my room. The moment their car drove off I sprinted towards to my room. He often hid presents in my room, free stuff he got from his work and knew I would enjoy. Under the mattress I found two tickets to a ballet show this Friday. I wished I'd my phone to thank him.

My mom knocked on my door, before walking in. I'd could just hide the tickets between the blankets. "I'm not happy that you sneaked out in the middle of the night. I wanted to let you go to Santana tonight, but since you already went, you can stay here now. Next time just ask me. And don't forget to ask her about Brooke tomorrow, otherwise you both have to come with next weekend."

"Okay mom." She gave me a quick peck on my forehead, before leaving again. I smiled a little, sometimes she was just like the mom I remembered from when I was little, when we were all little.

* * *

><p><strong>Copyright: The second verse of Only Child I've written myself. So please do not use or copy them without my permission.<strong>


	9. Get out

**A/N: Thanx again for all the reviews and addings, they give me the motivation to write.  
><strong>**  
>And a thank for trustinfaith who beta'd this for me.<br>****  
>Please leave a review :)<br>**

**8. Get out  
><strong>

_Quinn's POV_

I stared at my phone, trying to figure out the meaning of San's message. _I know._ I mean, way to be cryptic. I worried for a sec she knew about my diet, but she wouldn't say something like that with a text. I know she's watching me closely, even as B. But I can't tell them, they wouldn't understand. It's the only way for me to lose weight. But I still don't know what she knows and it's driving me nuts.

When another text arrives, I think S wants to drive me crazy, but it turns out to be from B. Asking if she should pick me up. I eagerly accept, maybe she knows what's up. However when I see the big pick-up standing in front of my house, I want to kick myself. I should've know she meant with S. B and Rachel were in the back. Not completely trusting this as B always sits shotgun, I climb in next to S. "Happy –" A second too late I realize Rae doesn't know it was S birthday yesterday. Everyone thinks her birthday is in the summer, because she gives her party then.

"Geez, tell another of my secrets while you're at it."

"It's your birthday Santana. And you didn't tell me." S gives me the angry glare. "Well, you can't ignore ones birthday. I must come over this afternoon to bake you a nice vegan cake, maybe with some carrots or Brussels-sprouts. And I didn't even had a chance to buy a present."

"This is your fault." S states. "It wasn't bad enough you told her I'm loathed, you also had to tell when my birthday was." _I know._ Finally I knew as well, she knew I told Rachel.

"Rachel, you promised not to tell."

"Funny, you promised me the same thing. I'm like really angry with you right now Q. I'll get you back for this, so you better start making this up to me." Funny thing is, she doesn't sound too angry. She looks really angry, but her voice is lacking.

"What do you want?"

"Well first of all, you must sing a song in Glee today about how totally awesome I am. Then you must carry my books for the whole week. And finally you must tell coach that I'm a better cheerleader then you."

"What no way, are you insane?"

"I think you should do it Quinn, after all you broke your promise."

"You broke yours as well," I counter Rachel.

"Yes, and I'll happily sing a song for you, carry your books and tell coach that you're a better cheerleader then me. Just as you should do with Santana. There is nothing wrong with proclaiming the truth."

"I love San's singing and cheering." B tells me dreamily, before staring out of her window.

"This is ridiculous. I'm not doing any of that."

"So that's how much you value our friendship." She stops the car. "Get out."

"What?" This is ridiculous, we fight all the time and never has she shut me out from her life. We both understand each other, as we both lash out when we're feeling angry, or upset, or attacked, or frustrated, or if the other hurts B's feelings, or …, a lot of the time actually. We always use the others weaknesses against them. If it wasn't for Britt, keeping us in line, we probably wouldn't have been friends in the first place. I look at B, she seems totally uninterested, which is completely out of character. Rae looks like she actually agrees with this. My thoughts are interrupted by San.

"Move it." I remove the seatbelt and open the door.

The moment my feet touch the street, she starts laughing. "You should have seen your face." It takes some time to control her laughter. "I told you I would get you back." She gives Rae a low five. "I already told her yesterday." I put my feet back in and slam the door.

"I can't believe you all were in on this." I turned directly to Rachel. "I can't believe you didn't tell me yesterday." We had an hour long phone call, when I checked whether or not she was still alive and not once she mentioned she knew everything.

"At least some people can keep their mouth shut. You could really learn from that." She was really enjoying this. "But you still have to make it up to me."

"I won't tell coach you're a better cheerleader."

"No, don't worry. I won't abuse your morals by making you say the truth. But anyway, Britts misses you with lunch, I don't know why, but you must join us for lunch every day this week." Okay, so she knows something is up. But that doesn't matter, I've hidden it for a few months already, a few lunches wouldn't ruin that. And otherwise it's none of their business, how I choose to lose weight.

"I missed you to Britt. So I'll be there, even if that is there."

"Watch it." She sounded a bit irritated now. I know I should stop now, but I can't.

"Or what, that?"

"Santana and I wrote a song." Rae blurts out, effectively stopping this argument. "I'll let you hear it." She grabs her Ipod and hands it over.

"You recorded it." S says surprised. I listen to the song and I must say it sounds good, especially the guitar solo in the middle. I already start to imagine how it would sound with the bass and the drums. I don't even notice we pull up at school, as I keep repeating the song, finding the best ways to improve it. I give the Ipod back to Rae, who is busy texting somebody. We all have different classes, so we go our different ways.

* * *

><p>I'm walking towards the Cheerios table, when I spot Rae sitting at a table alone. I can feel the stare of S in my back, before she also sees the diva sitting alone. I don't have to turn around, to know they are moving also. "Not in the choir room today." We'd been meeting there every day last week.<p>

"No, Kurt, Tina and Mercedes asked me to meet them here." Before I could even ask if we could join her, B and S set themselves down across Rae and I sat next to her. I took a bit of my salad, that I bought just to stop their suspicions.

"So what did you do this weekend?" I started the conversation, getting nervous as San was watching the food going in my mouth.

"Oh, it was so funny." B exclaimed, what surprised me, she wasn't able to come either. "They were watching one of those horror movies. And they didn't hear me come in. San's face looked like this." She made a very scared face, eyes wide open."

"Don't forget she screamed." Rae added, before the two of them locked eyes and they both started laughing. I couldn't help but imagine how S would have looked, we all knew she hated horror movies. And I started laughing as well."

"It wasn't that funny," she tried to sound annoyed, but we all could hear she didn't really mean it.

"It seems funny too me." Kurt said before sitting at the other side of Rachel and Mercedes sat next to Brit.

"What do you want Hummel, Wheezy?"

"Look, we asked Rachel to meet us for lunch."

"For what?" San asks defensively. And I can't help but wonder the same, it's not like the three of them are friends or anything.

"Well actually, about the three of you. But since we're all here, I ask you directly. What is your plan with Rachel?"

"Kurt," Rachel tries to intercept, but she's ignored.

"I don't like that insularly tone."

"Santana," Mercedes tries it this time. "We're just checking that you're not playing a prank on her. I know we haven't always got along, but she doesn't deserve that."

"It's not a prank. You know that Rae, don't you?" B looks at Rae, who avoids her gaze. "Rae?" But she doesn't answer.

"Well, it's not." I exclaim. "Anything else?"

"No need to be so defensive. We're her friends, we've a right to worry." Mercedes says.

"If you're such good friends, than why don't she eats lunch with you every day."

"Because she didn't want too. She can if she wants. You know that right?" Again Mercedes speaks up. We all start to look at Rachel now, who starts to look really uncomfortable.

"Well no actually," she finally answers. "I didn't know you considered us to be friends." Kurt shockingly put his hand on his hart, drama queen. "And I know it's not a prank. Just sometimes, when I'm at home I can't get rid of these doubts."

"Don't listen to what anyone says, we are your friends." San looks meaningful at Rae, and I get the feeling I'm missing something here."

"Just to be clear, if you guys hurt her." Mercedes looks at San and me. "I'll –"

"If I hurt her you can slushy me every day for the rest of the year." San interjects. They even shake on it. During the conversation I slowly eat the salad. I'm happy I skipped breakfast this morning and if I skip dinner, it will be okay.

We all look up, when the jocks come into the cafeteria hopping, because their shoes are stuck together. Seeing the smirk on San's face, I know she has something to do with this. One of them goes down, taking two down with him in the fall. The whole cafeteria erupts in laughter, well everyone except Rachel Berry.

"You said you wouldn't do anything."

"I said I wouldn't beat them up."

"What is it you did exactly?" Kurt asked curiously.

"Super glued their shoes together, and to their feet." Sometimes I forget the brilliance that was Santana. But these kind of stunts she mostly just pulls for Britt, but the sound of it she did it for Rae this time, so that left only one question.

"Why?"

"They indirectly slushied Rae, when I banned all slushies on her. And nobody ignores Santana Lopez and gets away with it."

"You got skills." Mercedes complemented S, while Tina sat next to Kurt.

"What happened to the jocks?" While Mercedes and Kurt start explaining everything, B looked at me and Rae.

"Is it okay if my sister comes this weekend?"

"Off course," Rae answers for the both of us, while I nod to let her know I approve as well. I haven't seen Brooke in ages.

"Great. We'll be coming later, Jonathan gave us some tickets for the ballet show this Friday."

"You mean the ballet show from The Kovinsky Dancers." Rae as excitingly. "I heard they are really good."

"They are. I saw some video's on youtube. Are you going?" Kurt joined the conversation.

"I am."

"I'm so jealous right now."

"Are that those European dancers, Mike talked about them for hours."

"You wanna go?" S asks me. I just shrug. It sounds great the way they all talk about it, and probably would be fun to go. So I nod after a few seconds. She grabs her phone and starts making a call. "B, did you bring those tickets." B got them out of her wallet and handed them over. The rest of the group were stunned, when San asked for another seven tickets. When she hang up, she looked around. "What?"

"Did you order tickets for us?" Rae asked surprised. Even knowing that S was loaded, she still didn't expect her to just order some expensive tickets.

"Yeah," she responded, in a 'duh' voice.

"While I appreciate it Santana, I'm afraid I can't afford it."

"Lady Face, when exactly did I say you'd to pay me back."

"Really," Tina asked? S just shrugged, not liking all this attention. "Thank you Santana."

"Yeah, yeah. Don't mention it." She thought for a second. "Seriously, I don't want the rest of the Glee club to invite themselves or Mr. Schue turning it into a group bonding thing."

They all quickly agreed and talked more about the show. They decided to have a dinner before the show at breadsticks. Basically we all had a good time, and it remembered me of last year. When I was pregnant and no longer a cheerio. I even stayed with Mercedes for some time, which I know hurt San, that I didn't came to live with her. But she never offered and I didn't want to intrude. But the glee club had been here for me. And after being a total bitch to them this year, well me and San, they accepted us and welcomed into their group again. But as always, when everything is going right, someone has to ruin it.

"Rachel can I talk to you for a moment?"

"Sure." She turned to Finn, waiting for him to start talking.

"I meant in private." Did he want her back again? No way I was going to let that happen.

"If you want to talk to me, you must do it here. And if it's something you can't say in front of them, then I don't want to hear it." And with that she turned around again, ignoring the tall boy behind her.

"Move it Frankenteeth."

Finn just ignored San. "Rachel, I don't know why you're making this so hard. I just want to talk to you."

"Are you deaf?" I questioned him. God, what did I ever see in that idiot? "She doesn't want to talk to you."

"Stay out of this Quinn. Rachel, come on?"

"Finn, please. Leave her alone. Your pestering isn't helping." Kurt tried to reason with him. Finn ignored him as well and grabbed toon Rachel shoulders, trying to turn her back to him. I saw her flinch and jumped up, pushing him back."

"Walk away, while you still can." I threatened him, while standing protectively in front of her. San joined me, and we both stared him down, but at the way her fist were clenching, I knew she really, really wanted to punch him. At least Finn finally got the message and left the cafeteria. After making sure Finn really left and that Rae was okay, S and B also left. With S this worked up, she would totally tear everyone at the table a new one if she stayed.

* * *

><p>We didn't see Finn again, until Glee. He was giving Rachel his biggest smile and I remembered I used to find it hot, when he looked at me like that. Now I just wanted to swipe it off his face. We sat down on the front row, and S and B sat behind us. Mr. Schue walked in, excitingly clapping his hands. "Okay guys. Finn asked to sing a song, so Finn take it away." All the other guys stood up as well, forming his back-up. Puck played the guitar.<p>

"Rachel, this is for you.

_I wish you smelled a little funny  
>Not just funny really bad<br>We could roam the streets forever  
>Just like cats but we'd never stray<br>I sometimes wish you were a mermaid  
>I could raise you in the tub at home<br>We could take a swim together  
>On weekly day trips to the bay<em>

_Oh you and me_  
><em>It would be only you and me<em>  
><em>Oh you and me<em>  
><em>It would be only you and me<em>

_I wish you were a little bigger_  
><em>Not just big but really fat<em>  
><em>Doors you would no longer fit through<em>  
><em>In my bed you would have to stay<em>  
><em>I often wish that you had feathers<em>  
><em>I'd keep you in a giant cage<em>  
><em>All day long I'd sit and watch you<em>  
><em>I'd sing for you and that would be okay<em>

_Oh you and me_  
><em>It would be only you and me<em>  
><em>Oh you and me<em>  
><em>It would be only you and me<em>  
><em>People say there are plenty of fish<em>  
><em>In the sea, baby, all I do is wish<em>

_I wish, I wish, I wish you were a little slower_  
><em>Not just slow but paralyzed<em>  
><em>Then I could plug you into a socket<em>  
><em>So you could never run away<em>  
><em>I really wish that you were smaller<em>

Rae snorted at this comment, and I let out a chuckle. Of course she would be most offended by this line.  
><em><br>Not just small but really really short  
>So I could put you in my pocket<br>And carry you around all day  
>Oh you and me<br>It would be only you and me  
>Oh you and me<br>It would be only you and me  
><em>

He looks at her hopefully. "Thank you Finn." Wait, what! Don't tell me she actually liked that. "I think that is exactly why our relationship didn't work out. Because you kept wishing I would change. Mr. Schue, I would like to sing a song as well." He seemed to hesitate, but visible gulped when he caught the glares of S and me and nodded. She stood up, whispered something to Brad, before turning around. "I think it's very obvious who this is for."

_You told me  
>There's no need<br>To talk it out  
>Cause it's too late<br>To proceed  
>And slowly<br>I took your words  
>And walked away<em>

_No looking back_  
><em>I won't regret, no<em>  
><em>I will find my way<em>  
><em>I'm broken<em>  
><em>But still I have to say<em>

_It's Alright, it's OK_  
><em>I'm so much better without yo<em>u

"Hell yeah," I heard San agree and she was absolutely right.  
><em><br>I won't be sorry  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>So don't you bother what I do  
>No matter what you say<br>I won't return  
>Our bridge has burned down<br>I'm stronger now  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>I'm so much better without you  
>I won't be sorry<em>

_You played me_  
><em>Betrayed me<em>  
><em>Your love was nothing but a game<em>  
><em>Portrayed a role<em>  
><em>You took control, I<em>  
><em>I couldn't help but fall<em>  
><em>So deep<em>  
><em>But now I see things clear<em>

B pulled me and S to the floor and we danced around, while singing the chorus with Rae. Kurt, Mercedes, Tina and Mike also joined.  
><em><br>It's Alright, it's OK  
>I'm so much better without you<br>I won't be sorry  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>So don't you bother what I do  
>No matter what you say<br>I won't return  
>Our bridge has burned down<br>I'm stronger now  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>I'm so much better without you  
>I won't be sorry<em>

_Don't waste your fiction tears on me_  
><em>Just save them for someone in need<em>  
><em>It's way too late<em>  
><em>I'm closing the door<em>

The rest of the group joined as well, all except Finn.  
><em><br>It's Alright, OK  
>I'm so much better without you<br>I won't be sorry  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>So don't you bother what I do  
>No matter what you say<br>I won't return  
>Our bridge has burned down<br>I'm stronger now  
>It's Alright, it's OK<br>I'm so much better without you  
>I won't be sorry<em>

_It's Alright, it's OK_  
><em>Alright, OK<em>  
><em>Without you<em>  
><em>No matter what you say<em>  
><em>It's Alright, it's OK<em>  
><em>Alright, OK<em>  
><em>Without you<em>  
><em>I won't be sorry<em>

"I hope this makes it clear, that we are over. Finchel is gone forever."

"But Rachel, I love you and I know you love me too. Don't listen to what they tell you," he even had to courage to point directly at S, B and me. "Listen to your heart."

"They've nothing to do with my decision Finn."

"Finn, she's just not that into you. Anymore." Sam spoke up. Now the boy looked to Mr. Schue for help, but he just avoided Finn's gaze.

"Fine, but when they dump you, don't come running to me." He kicked a chair against the wall, before storming out. Rae trembled a little and I pulled her against me and guided her back to her chair. She leaned against me, and I kept my arm around her shoulders. She didn't tremble anymore, but I guess we both didn't want to let go. The rest of Glee we discussed some songs for Regionals. The little input Rae gave, making it clear that the whole Finn thing was bothering her, more then she wanted to admit. Finally Mr. Schue let us all go. S and B dropped me off. Rae had gone home herself.

* * *

><p>During dinner mom kept talking about Michael. The great perfect son-in-law, who she was trying to set me up with. He and his parents were here last weekend. Which is why I couldn't go to Santana. No matter our spats, I could always come. Except that one time I called Britt stupid, I couldn't come for two weeks. And if it wasn't for Britt I'm pretty sure I would still be banned. Even though we considered each other our best friends, no one could come between B and S. And I was happy for them, but sometimes I just got sick of watching them together all the time.<p>

I told my parents I wasn't hungry, before going to my room. I wonder whether or not to call Rae. It was nice talking to her. She made me forget my problems. And it wasn't weird to check on her, after the day she had, wasn't it? I finally send a text, to which I received an immediate response. I smiled when we continued texting each other.

* * *

><p><strong>Songs:<strong>

You and me - Milow

It's alright, it's okay - Ashley Tisdale


	10. Our secret

**A/N: Well, I finally finished chapter 9, so here it is. I'm going to try my hardest, to update faster, but with my busy life, it is a challenge. My thanks for everyone who is still following this and reviewing, it motivates me to keep going.  
><strong>

**9. Our secret**

_Santana's POV_

The rest of the week I watched Q as a hawk and I'm pretty sure she knows that we know. However as she still eats something, B thinks we should wait for her to come to us or we'll scare her away. And I know it's true, Q is a pro in running away from her problems. However I don't want to wait till it gets even worse. Rae also came to the lunch instead of practicing her scales. I can't believe that until a few weeks ago we were 'enemies', now I can't imagine that she won't be near. She's watching Q as well, she also noticed it. We should discuss it this weekend, maybe she knows how to help Q, without freaking her out.

It was Friday and coach had arranged another extra Cheerios practice, so Rae would pick up Brooke from school with Britt's car and come back, so we could go straight to Breadstixs. After Sue decided she yelled at us enough for the day, we were allowed to go. I'd to suppress a laugh when I saw Brooke and Rae watching us from the tribune. Standing next to each other you couldn't miss that Brooke was only a few inches shorter then Rae, even when she was ten years younger. In a record time of five minutes the three of us showered, get dressed and looked smoking hot. The other cheerios eyed us suspiciously, we were never quick. Britt and I were actually known for being the slowest. The moment we step outside the locker room I'm hugged by Brooke. "I'm going to sleep at your house tonight. Isn't that great Sanny?"

"It sure is, princesa. Now let get our eats on. I'm starving." I saw Britt and Brooke laughing at that expression. No matter how many times her mother asked me to stop learning her daughters 'immigrant English', I wouldn't. It encouraged me to do it more often. Especially if it made those two laugh, every single time. We took my car, leaving Britt's behind for the weekend, and made our way to Breadstixs. The rest of the group was waiting for us. Mike shook my hand, thanking me for the tickets, before he opened the door for all us girls and Kurt. Rae had had the foresight to reserve a table, so we didn't have to wait. Not that I ever had to wait, I'm Santana Lopez. I've already got two managers fired from this place, the new one didn't dare to cross me. "So Brooke, this are Asian, other Asian, Lady Face and Wheezy."

"Santana," I laughed at the scolding sound of Rae's voice. "Don't learn her those rude names."

"Britt," I asked her, with one word.

"Okay, so this is Other Asian and Asian and not the other way around. And this is Unicorn and Beyonce. And you already know Q and Rae."

Rachel huffed dramatically, making us all laugh. "You two are impossible."

"Don't worry about it girl, we're used to it." Cedes spoke up. "Satan has a way with names." She looked at me, daring to say something about it, when the waiter arrived. Rae looked questioningly to the card, not seeming to find something vegan.

"What kind of vegan stuff do you have?" I asked for her, since she wasn't going to do it herself.

"I've fish, or an omelet." This guy was really an idiot.

"You best makes something vegan now."

He actually had the courage the roll his eyes at me. Before sighing dramatically. "That are the only vegan options we've. If you don't like it, you better go somewhere else. There are people enough who want to eat here."

B gave me an encouraging nod. Whispering to Brooke to watch very carefully. "You better listen good, jobless piece of shit. I'm Santana Lopez." His eyes widened. "Yeah that's right. So you're going to get your manager right now, before I endz you." He hurried away from the table.

"Is that how she got her wheelbarrow filled with breadsticks?" Brooke asked her older sister.

"Tell me you didn't? I thought you were joking when you told that story." However my proud smirk answered any questions Rae might have.

"Yeah princesa, that's how we do it in Lima Heights." The manager appeared at our table, apologizing for the inconvenience. After making sure she would prepare something vegan, the rest of us ordered. I told the rest of how I wrapped the manager of Breadstix around my finger. I might exaggerate a little bit, because I wanted to impress Brooke. I know she adored me, she had known me her whole life. For her I was just another sister, only cooler, who taught her all the badass stuff.

"You didn't climb on the table and start throwing plates against the wall." B stopped my wonderful story.

"Well I totally could have, just so you know."

"I know." We shared a look, before I felt Q kick me under the table. At the look at B's face, she also met Q's foot. "Anyways."

"Just curious, so please don't kill me." Kurt looked at me, so I nodded. "Are you and Britt together?" Oh crap, they noticed the look.

"No," my defenses immediately high.

"Were just friends." Brooke gave B a questioningly look, before claiming that she had to go to the bathroom. "Yeah, me too."

"Me three," I added, and the two of us hurried after her sister. I could only pray that Q and Rae would do some damage control over there.

"Brooke," Britt called out. "Where are you?" We heard some flushing, before she came out. She glared at me, before looking at B.

"What's wrong?" I asked. Wrong move. She stormed over to me and started hitting me with her fists. I didn't really hurt, so I didn't stop her.

"You broke up, after you promised. I hate you." The promise, she was right. I promised her I would love her sister forever and ever.

"Brooke," B said stern. "You don't hit Santana or tell her that you hate her. Now apologize." But Brooke stubborn shook her head.

"Brooke, I didn't break the promise. I still love Brittany very, very much. We're just not ready to let everyone now okay? It's like our secret. Only the people we love can know it."

I saw Brooke thinking, trying to process what I told her. "I'm sorry Sanny."

"It's okay. But no matter what we say, I love Britt and I love you."

"Love you both too." Britt gave me a quick peck. After which she send me back, so she could talk to her little sister a bit more. I felt sorry for Brooke, having received enough lectures of Britt myself. I waited outside the bathroom, not willing to face the rest of the group alone. They sure would have questions. A few minutes later the two blondes came out and the three of us went back to the table.

Rae, Mike and Kurt were discussing the dancers, telling what they read and saw so far. I was glad they kept on talking, when the three of us sat down. It didn't take long for the food to arrive. Including a ridiculous amount of breadsticks. Most of the table had ordered more then enough food, only Q settled for just one salad.

"No bacon?" Cedes asked surprised. "You used to live on that alone." The remark reminding most of us at the table, that Q just to live with her for some time.

"I'm a cheerio again, so coach would kill me if I would eat that."

"Never stopped me." I added, waiting for her reaction.

"Maybe that's why you aren't head cheerio anymore."

"No that is because some backstabbing bitch told on me."

"Well if you weren't so insecure to get a boob job."

"Stop it, both of you." In the back of my mind I heard Brittany. However I was too worked up to stop now.

"I'm insecure. What about you? You're a fucking anorexic, and don't even deny it."

"Fuck you! Fuck all of you." Q stormed away. For the first time I remembered that we weren't alone. Tina and Mike tried to look everywhere else but me. Kurt and Mercedes just looked between me and where Quinn just left. Rae looked worried. She never witnessed a real fall out between us. Britt looked just disappointed and Brooke gave me a puzzled look, like she was trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

Britt nudged me, "go." She was right, I'd to do some damage control. I stood up and hurried after her. I found her a few minutes away from Breadstix, sitting on a wooden bench.

"Britt send you." It wasn't a question, never the less I nodded. "Just tell her I went home."

"Q"

"No," she stood up. "I don't wanna hear it. I don't want some half meant apology." She came closer till we were face to face, before she continued her screaming. "Sometimes I wonder why were friends at all."

What the hell, were was this coming from. "So now you don't even want to be friends anymore." In the back of my mind I heard a small voice, that sounded a lot like Britt. Telling me to stop, but I couldn't. "Fine by me."

"So, I'm that replaceable for you." She sounded seriously pissed off and I wondered if it would escalate in a physical fight. "Well I guess you found new people to hang out with. Wonder if they stick around, if they know your own parents don't.

It was a low blow and I felt the hurt at that statement. "You would know. You choose Mercedes over me." She looked a little taken back with that. But now I finally said what had bothered me for months, I wasn't going to stop. "You stayed with Finn, I understood. With Puck I thought the baby was making you crazy. But finally you picked Mercedes over me."

"You never offered." She yelled at me.

"I shouldn't have." I yelled even louder. "You should have barged into my home, sit down on the couch and demand I would cook bacon for you. So I could tell you to move your fat ass and do it yourself." I turned around and walked away.

"Santana." But I didn't want to hear it. The truth was finally known, and for the first time I didn't want to deny how much it hurt me. That she didn't want to live with me. That she choose some people she hardly knew over me. My own parents didn't want to stay with me, and apparently neither wanted my friends. "I'm sorry."

"Save it." I called back, without looking at her. I didn't want to hear some excuse. Nothing she would say would stop the hurt inside. The hurt of being left alone for more than a week as a eight-year old. The hurt when I turned eleven and they weren't there. The first time they didn't come home for Christmas. I felt tears gathering, but I tried to suppress them. I wasn't going to cry. I'd cried enough over them. Q came up behind me, trying to pull me into a hug, put I turned around and pushed her away. It was easier to stop from crying if I got angry at her. And it was her fault, she had to make me remember. "Don't touch me. I hate you. I don't know why I cared that you're anorexic. For my part you can drop dead."

"San," I heard Britt behind me. I saw Q put away her phone. It didn't took me too long to put two and two together. "Thanks Q," B confirmed my suspicions. Q walked away, leaving the two of us. "You wanna talk about it." She asked, like it actually was an option. Britt always wanted to talk about it, and she had a way of always getting what she wanted. Not that I was whipped or anything.

"Later," I mumbled against her shoulder, as again I was trying not to cry. With Q gone, I'd no other options but feel the hurt of my parents absence again.

"I love you. And there is a little girl waiting inside who adores you as well." As always she knew exactly where my thoughts were and pulled me back. Brooke came into my mind, I love her like she is my own sister. And Britt, she was my soul mate I was sure of that. Except for that one thing two years ago, we never had any problems. I sniffled a bit, before lifting my head of her shoulder. "Now let's go back inside, finish dinner and enjoy the show. I'm so happy you invited the others to come. It's nice to make new friends." And she was right, as always. It had been the unholy trinity for so long, that it didn't even cross my mind to get more friends. But take some out of these gleeks outside of school and they were actual nice and fun people to hang out with. Not that I would ever say that to their face.

"Okay. Can you see?" She gave me a thorough look, scanning for any signs of crying, before giving me a peck.

"All good. Now let's get inside and eat. Me is starving." I managed a small smile at that.

"I love you too." I whispered into her ear as we walked back into the restaurant. Q was already sitting at the table. I was aware of the looks everyone gave us, but nobody spoke up. However that could have something to do with the glare Q gave them. "Let's just eat."

"Great idea." Rae spoke up. "I've to say that this a good vegan lasagna. They should totally put it on the card."

"Are there a lot of vegan restaurants in Lima?" Tina picked up the conversation. And the two of them engaged in small talk. Taking the focus of Q, B and me. I certainly hoped this evening would not consist of me running after people.

When everybody was finished eating, we all piled into our cars and went to the only theatre in Lima. Despite being such a small theatre, they got a lot of famous groups here. They eyed us suspicious, being a group of teenagers without an adult. But as I handed over the tickets, I see recognition on their face as they read my name. I'm well known here as well, what can I say. My girl always gets the best. We quickly give our coats to the wardrobe, as we're just on time. The theater was pretty full. Me, Britt and Brooke sit in the middle, with at one side Quinn, Tina and Mike and on the other Rachel, Mercedes and Kurt. I've too say that the dancers are incredible. I only sneak a few peeks at my blondes, who are engrossed in the performance with a twinkle in their eyes.

During the intermission Mike and Britt were discussing some dance movements. Tina and I stood at a table. The rest had gone for drinks. "Can you imagine in twenty years, they'll discuss every little toe movement and we'll be standing here, laughing at them."

"Yeah," I said, before I thought about it. What that statement actually meant. Looking at Tina's face, it wasn't how she meant it either. "But, you know not like that." I tried to cover myself.

"It's okay Santana. I won't tell." She smiled at me, before turning her attention to our future spouses. They were dancing together, a crowd gathering around them. I was mesmerized by her movements, loving her laughing face. This was how this evening should have been. The two of them looked surprised when the applaud started after their last movement. They made a bow to the audience, before joining us. The rest of the show was just as awesome as the first and after it, we said our goodbyes and the five of us went back to my place. Brooke was exhausted, and so was I to be honest, therefore we all just went to bed. Brooke insisting that she would lie in the middle of the bed, between Britt and me. Making Q and Rae lay at the outside. I fell asleep quickly.


	11. Ridiculous ideas

**A/N: I want to thank everyone, who is reading, or read this fic. Reviewed, favorited or alerted it. **

**I know it has been a while, but here is the new chapter. **

**I love to know what you think of this chapter, so leave a review.  
><strong>

**Ridiculous ideas**

_Santana POV_

By the time I woke up, Q and I were the only ones left in the bed. "Morning," she said to me, before sitting up.

"Not now." I was so not ready for a conversation about what happened last night.

"I didn't say anything."

"You were going to. Let's just go downstairs."

"We'll have to talk about is some time, why not now." She stood up and closed the door, leaning against it, making it clear that leaving wasn't an option. "I'm sorry for what I said yesterday, about your parents." She sighed before sitting down on the bed. "It's how we work, you hurt me, I hurt you." I scoff, like that's any apology. "It's wrong, and we both know it. But once we start, we just can't seem to stop. I'm sorry I didn't stay with you. It was a very confusing period in my life, we didn't see each other that much, because I spend most of my weekends either with Finn or Puck. When Mercedes offered I was so happy to leave Puck's house behind, that I didn't even consider your house. And since you never said anything about it, I thought you were okay with that."

"I was okay with that. You dumped me and Britt faster than Sue changes choreography. But next time you choose those misfits over us, please don't bother coming back." I grabbed some clothes and went to the shower, before Q could call me out on my lie. She was right, Britt and I hadn't been there for her. We were just going through some other stuff at the time. When I came out of the bathroom, I was happy to see that Q had left. I went downstairs, seeing my favorite girls watching a Disney, while singing along.

"Sanny," Brooke run to me and jumped, expecting me to catch her. Which I did and I spun her around. "I thought you were never ever going to get up."

"That's a bit exaggerated. We just didn't expect you before dinner." I shot Rae a glare, but she didn't seem fazed by it. Which actually was a good thing.

"Oh come on, I'm not that bad." They all stayed silent. "Well, if that's what you think, I'll go back to sleep."

"No," I felt Brooke arms tighten her grip. "You've to stay here and make me those special pancakes." She nodded against me, as to convince me from her idea. "Please Tana."

"Sure princessa, I could use some help." I put het down and she immediately runs to the kitchen. I give Britt a hug and quick kiss.

"Tana!" Brooke returned, hands on her hips. "You said you would make your pancakes."

"I'm coming." Together we made the pancakes, with smiling faces on them. We used bacon for the mouth, pineapple for the nose, M&M's for the eyes and syrup for the hair and whipped cream for the eyebrows. While Brooke finished up, I made a fruit salad for Rae and Q. When we finished we brought it all out to the dining room. Brooke dragged everyone from the couch and we all sat down. "I made a fruit salad for you Quinn. Very healthy."

"Thanks," and she actually started eating it. But maybe that had more to do with all of us looking at her. "Aren't you going to eat?" With that we all started our own food.

"What is an anorexic?" Brooke looked at me and Q, but when neither of us answered, she looked at Britt.

"An anorexic is someone who doesn't eat." I explained, when the silence became too much.

"But Quinn is eating now. And she was eating in the restaurant. So she isn't anorexic then."

"I shouldn't have said that." I replied, not saying that I was wrong. No matter how smart Brooke was for her age, she didn't need to know these kind of things about Q. "I'm sorry," I said directly to Q.

"It's okay."

We all finished our food in comfortable silence, before watching another movie. We did our homework, ordered take out, played some games and watched yet another movie. During that last one Brooke fell asleep. Britt carefully cared her to bed and put her down.

"We need to talk," she stated when she came down. "We're really worried about you Q. You don't eat much, you throw up a lot. I heard you last night, when you thought we were all sleeping."

"It's not like it sounds. I'm doing this new diet, but it upsets my stomach causing me to throw up. I'm not anorexic, I don't have an eating problem."

"Quinn, you don't have to do a diet. I'm quite sure that your bmi is perfect, maybe even a bit low. Further if a diet is giving your such nausea, I would certainly advice you to stop it. If you would like to eat healthier I would suggest to try veganism."

"Quinn, please just be honest with us. We're you're friends, we only want what is best for you." Britt said.

"What's best for me? What's best for me is if you all stop this ridiculous ideas you guys have. I don't have anorexia, I don't have an eating problem."

"Okay." _Okay?_ It wasn't okay, so why did Britt say that, but I also knew that Britt wouldn't want me to interrupt and scream at Q ,until she understood that she has a problem. "If you say everything is fine, we believe you. Just remember we're here for you. Whenever you need us."

"Thanks I guess." There was an awkward silence. Nobody knew what to say after the serious talk we just had.

"I must say I'm pretty tired. So I might go to bed." Rae broke the silence. We all agreed with her and joined a sleeping Brooke.

Britt woke me and Q up early, so I could drive Q home, in time for church. The rest of the Sunday we spend hanging around, Brooke and Britt trying to learn how to dance like the Kovinsky dancers. "Santana, can we've a word." I wonder what's wrong, while I follow Rae to the kitchen. "So what are you going to do Wednesday." It takes me a second to understand what she's referring too. It's valentine's day. I sigh another valentine's day, and still we're keeping our relation a secret. "I think you should sing her a song in glee." I shot her the look of _are you fucking insane_. "Don't worry, I'll take care of it. You just prepare a song."

"I'm not sure if I'm ready to come out like that."

"You're not coming out, unless you want to. No one will know the meaning of the song, except the four of us."

"Five, Tina figured it out." That reminded me, I still had to tell Britt about that. "I'll think about it." She had a point, Britt would love it if I sung her a song in glee. However, I wasn't sure about it. What if everybody figured it out.

"Okay, and if you need help with your song, just ask me." A song, that was a good one.

"Why are you talking about me?" Me and Rae turned around, Britt was standing in the doorway. I wondered how much she heard. "My ears are hot, so someone is talking about me."

"We were just saying what a great dancers you and your sister are. Right Santana?"

"Yeah. I'll cook us some dinner."

"Great I help." Rae offers, I see Britt looking at both of us, she knows something is up.

"Okay, she gives me a quick peck, before grabbing some water and going back to the living room.

While we're cooking, I think about what song I could sing. Until I figure out the perfect one. "Okay, I've a song." I sing a bit to her, and she agrees. Now I just have to wait, wondering Rae is going to arrange everything.

* * *

><p><em>Quinn POV<em>

I wasn't anorexic, I wasn't. I knew my way of eating wasn't the most healthy, but I didn't have an eating disorder. However they wouldn't believe it, no matter what. I just had to prove it to them. I would eat with them at lunch every day. No more breakfast or dinner, only lunch. Then everything should be okay. I looked in the mirror again. I was fat, you could still see I carried a baby. I quickly covered myself, before going for a run. I'd to burn those calories.

Monday came way too soon. To prepare for this week of indulgence, I didn't eat a single thing yesterday. I'd cramps in my stomach, but you know what they say. One must suffer to be beautiful. Everyone was going on about valentine's day. I kind of forgot it. During glee everyone was making love eyes to their lover. It reminded me that I was alone, all alone. Although there was someone I kind of liked.

"Good morning, my fellow glee members. For this year's valentine's day I've a very special idea. Instead of duets, or serenading your own partner, which are always discriminating to us who are alone. I thought this year, we all should sing a love song to a random member. So I've taken the liberty, to put all our names in this computer program, to give us the one to serenade this week. So all those in favor."

The only ones raising their hand were San, Britt, Finn and myself. The rest was still trying to understand what she had said. I wasn't even sure what she meant, and I'm sure neither were San, Britt and the oaf, but we supported her anyway.

"Just agree already. She's gonna get her way, one way or another. And I gots me better things to do, than listening to her ramble all day." At the same time S was also texting someone. I guess Tina, as I saw her look at her phone, before rising her hand. Mike supported his girl friend of course.

"Great that's a majority. So here's the list, look at who you will be singing." I quickly looked at the list. I would be singing to Kurt, and Britt would sing for me. That was okay, I guess. I would rather be singing to someone else. The rest of glee we just sang a little together, It wasn't until the end, that something strange happened. Britt was already out the door, while San stopped to have some whispered conversation with Rae. They looked at me for a minute, before both walking out. I looked at the list again. Rae would be singing to Mike and San to Britt.

The bell rang and I hurried to class. During my free period I received a text from Rae, asking me to meet her in the choir room. Wondering what was going on, as Rae would normally use her free period to practice her singing and dancing, I let her know I was on my way. Entering I saw her and San, the latter playing a song on the guitar. "Hi Q," she greeted me, never stopping playing. "I think I've got it. Now the song self."

"So why did I've to come here." Hoping that they would finish soon, and San would leave. I lo-, liked, I liked spending time with Rae alone. Any chance of that happening vanished, when Tina also walked in.

"Great, now that we're all here, we can start." Rae announced.

"Start with what?" I asked. They hadn't answered my other question, and it was bothering me not to know what was happening. Rae and San were looking at each other, as in deciding who was going to speak. After a few seconds Rae crossed her arms, staring at San.

"Okay, I want to sing a song to Britt. And I want you to help me." That explained everything. The whispers, the randomly picked partners. Which wasn't completely random.

"Of course," Tina answered, and she even smiled. Like she knew the truth, like she knew how important this actually was for Santana.

"Tina knows, by the way." Oh, she really knew it. "So this is the song," San played the guitar, while singing. After that we went over the song, we're we would sing back-up, and we even choreographed a little dance. We all agreed to meet up again tomorrow during lunch. Tina would ask Mike to distract Britt.

The rest of the day went fast. S was staring at me again during lunch, but a subtle nudge from Britt made her stop. I eat everything on my plate, pretending I didn't feel my body getting fatter with every bite.


	12. I don't know

**A/N: Here I'm again. I know it has been a while. I've been travelling around the world. Mostly given up on this story, only when I've opened my mail and saw all the new followers, favorite and reviews, I decided I should continue this. **

**I've edited the other chapters. Mostly just grammar and spelling. The biggest chance is that Santana has never told Quinn about Rachel's parents. English is still not my native language, so there will still be mistakes. **

**I will do my best to post regulary.**

**Please keep reviewing, it motivates me to write.**

* * *

><p><strong>I don't know<strong>

_Rachel POV_

I was happy Santana had listened to me, and prepared a song for Brittany. We practiced it again at lunch today, and it sounded wonderful. Brittany was surely going to love it. If we weren't living in such a small minded town, Santana would probably be out already. And they wouldn't have to hide their relationship. But things are, the way they are. If you could change thing, by wishing for them, my fathers would have been their normal, loving selves. I only had one class left, before I'd to go home. Dad had been really rough yesterday, so I wasn't looking forward going home today. However I knew I'd to. I was only sixteen, so I'd to live with them. And I wouldn't want to get them in any trouble. I knew that deep inside their hearts, they still were the same men that raised me.

"Hi Rachel." Finn stood next to my locker, smiling at me.

"Well, hello Finn. Can I help you with something?" I asked nicely, as I remembered how angry he had kicked that chair last week. I didn't want to piss him off, especially when it was only the two of us.

"Well, tomorrow is valentine's day, and I was wondering if you would want to go to dinner with me?" I didn't really want to. I remembered having dinner when we we're going out, and we mostly went to restaurants without any vegan options.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea Finn."

"Why not?" His voice was a little harsher.

"Well, I don't think we work that well in a relationship. And I would much rather be friends with you."

"Come on Rach, we are awesome together. We're Finchel. I knew I screwed up a lot, but I'll be better this time. I'll prove it, go to dinner with me."

"Let me think about it Finn." I wasn't going, but no way I was saying that to his face.

"Think about what," Quinn interrupted. And I was glad to see her. Finn would surely not doing anything with her here.

"Let me know Rach." Finn said, before walking away.

"What's going on?"

"Finn asked me to go out with me tomorrow."

"And you said you would think about it, I thought you were finished with that moron." Quinn did look a bit upset, although I'd no idea why.

"Well, I learned a few weeks ago to be careful with my wording. Especially around those with a lack of controlling their anger. So I'll text Finn later, that I won't be going out with him. And then he has time to calm down, before we see each other again."

"I'm sorry." Not the reaction I was expecting, I wasn't sure why she was apologizing. "I'm sorry that you're not safe her in school, that you don't feel safe to say the things you want to say. But I'll protect you from now on. And so will S and B. And I know that S hurt you before, but that really was a onetime thing, and seriously she never hurts her friends."

"Thank you Quinn, that means a lot to me."

"So, you've no date for valentine's day."

"No, I haven't. And"

She hold up her hand, telling me to stop. "I haven't either, and I don't want to, to be honest. So what do you say, if we just go eat for dinner, just the two of us."

"We'll miss Fabray, are you asking me out on date?" I teased her a little. I would like to go to dinner with her."

"Would you want it to be a date?" Would I want that, that was a good question. I really liked Quinn, but did I like her as a friend, or as something more. And would she like me like that, that was also important to consider.

"Ask me first, then I'll let you know." I decided to go for the safe option. The choice had to be hers, and I felt myself hoping, that she would say it was a date. It answered the first question, I wanted it to be a date.

There was a silence between us. Until Quinn broke it. "I'll pick you up at 7 tomorrow." She quickly walked away after that. It was a bit weird, I'm afraid that I went too far with my questions . I'll just have to wait, to see how this will play out.

It was valentine's day. My daddy said it was okay if I went out tonight. I just hoped my dad wouldn't disagree. He was passed out when I came home yesterday. He had always been the hardest of the two to convince. Even before everything changed. I really hoped I could go, so much, that I actually was considering the possibility of sneaking out.

"Why won't you go out with me?" Finn's asks out of nowhere. He sound a little pissed off, and I do a quick scan, but don't see Quinn, Santana or Brittany anywhere. I continue walking towards my locker, and he follows me.

"Well, I've thought about it. I seriously did, but based on our previous dating experience, I believe it's for the best if we just stay friends."

"Come on Rach, just give me another shot. It's not like you're doing anything else tonight."

This irritated me, did he really insinuated that no one would want to go out with me. So I should be happy that he would even consider me. "For your information Finn, I do have other plans tonight. And I would very much appreciate it if you could leave me alone from now on. I thought I'd made my point very clear last week, about a relationship between us. It's not going to happen."

He punches the locker next to me. "Bullshit, "

"Is everything alright?" Mike suddenly stands next to me, looking between me and Finn. "Dude, you should really cool down and back off. It's not okay to scare a girl like that."

"Whatever," Finn mumbled, before walking away. I felt I could finally breath again, now that the threat was gone.

"Thank you Mike."

"No problem. If he bothers you again, tell me. No guy should treat a girl like that." The bell rang and we both went to our classes. The rest day was pretty uneventful, and I couldn't wait for glee.

It was finally time for glee. Santana told in her own way that she was going first, no matter what. Quinn, Tina and me got ready behind her. "This is for you Britt," she said, before sitting down and playing guitar.

_I __had no choice but to hear you__  
><em>_You stated your case time and again__  
><em>_I thought about it__You treat me like I'm a princess__  
><em>_I'm not used to liking that__  
><em>_You ask how my day was_

_You've already won me over in spite of me__  
><em>_Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet__  
><em>_Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are__  
><em>_I couldn't help it__  
><em>_It's all your fault_

_You're love is thick and it swallowed me whole__  
><em>_You're so much braver than I gave you credit for__  
><em>_That's not lip service_

_You've already won me over in spite of me__  
><em>_Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet__  
><em>_Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are__  
><em>_I couldn't help it__  
><em>_It's all your fault_

_You are the bearer of unconditional things__  
><em>_You held your breath and the door for me__  
><em>_Thanks for your patience_

_You're the best listener that I've ever met__  
><em>_You're my best friend__  
><em>_Best friend with benefits__  
><em>_What took me so long__I've never felt this healthy before__  
><em>_I've never wanted something rational__  
><em>_I am aware now__  
><em>_I am aware now_

_You've already won me over in spite of me__  
><em>_Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet__  
><em>_Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are__  
><em>_I couldn't help it__  
><em>_It's all your fault_

At the end of the song Brittany flung herself on Santana and they shared an extremely long hug. I'm pretty sure Santana mouthed "let's get out of here". But Britt shook her head. They returned to their seats, holding hands. I was happy for them from all the couples in glee, they were the only ones that will stay together forever. I was absolutely positive about that.

Tina sung _Girlfriend_ for Mercedes, which had everyone laughing. Santana was serenaded by Puck with _Right now. _At the end she looked like she was ready to punch him in the face, and the only thing stopping her was Brittany whispering in her ear.

I'd to sing to Mike and had chosen the song _But I Do Love_ You from Leann Rimes. I'm positive he liked it, all though I would be rather singing to someone else. However that was my own fault, I could have arranged it, but I forgot. I glanced at her a few times, but I focused mainly on Mike. A performance was a performance after all.

We ended with Britt who chose to serenade Quinn with Kiss The Girl from The Little Mermaid. She gave Quinn a hug, before disappearing with Santana. I had a feeling we wouldn't be seeing them today and maybe even tomorrow. I met up with Quinn and we discussed our plans for tonight. We decided to meet up at school, as I didn't want her to come to my house.

"Why not Rae?"

"Because my fathers will scare you away, with their interrogation. They are really bad." She didn't seem to agree. "Please for me."

"Fine, just this once. Next time I'll come pick you up." My heart fluttered at the thought of a next time. We reached the parking lot and we both went our own ways. I was in such a wonderful spirit all the way home, I almost started singing. Something I hadn't done in two months.

The moment I closed the door behind me my wonderful spirit was broken.. My father grabbed me by my neck immediately and threw me in the living room. "Where is it?"

"I don't know." The wrong answer, but I'd no idea what he was talking about. He started to kick me over and over, I tried to curl up and protect my abdomen and head as good as possible.

"The bottle of tequila, where is it?" My other father asked.

"I don't know," I say again. But they don't hear me, as my father keeps on kicking and punching me. I feel myself get numb, and it's not long before I completely black out.

The first thing I feel is pain, everywhere. I want to get up, I've to get up. I don't know why, just that I've to go. I want to get up, but my body doesn't agree. It doesn't work at all. I feel the black returning and I try fighting it, but it doesn't matter. My whole world turns black again.

The pain returns, and I lay still, waiting for the dizziness to disappear. I slowly opens my eyes, and it's all black. I blink a few times, and can make out a few shapes. I can't keep lying here, dad could be returning very soon. I manage to sit upright , taking in the messy living room. It takes a few tries, before I'm finally able to stand up and go to my room. I collapse on my bed and let the black take me over again.

_Quinn POV_

I check my phone again, but still nothing. I've waited one hour at school, but she didn't show. By then already called a few times and send some texts. I drove by her house, it was all dark. I rang the doorbell, knocked on the door and the window. No one answered. I called again. At the end I went home. Now I paced around my room, while checking my phone every minute. I think I've send enough texts by now, but I can't stop myself from calling, again. No answer, again. I sigh as I look in the mirror, maybe I should be glad to have missed dinner. My body was fat and disgusting enough as it was. I shouldn't have eaten that sandwich for lunch. I should get rid of it.

I'm almost at the toilet, when my phone rings. I've never picked up a phone quicker in my life. I was most disappointed to hear Carol, some freshmen cheerleader, to inform me that tomorrows practice was cancelled. Apparently Sue had a date and couldn't be bothered to whip our lazy asses in shape. Well at least someone was having a date. I wondered if Rachel ditched me, because I never answered her date question. I wanted it to be a date, I really did. But admitting that would make everything that much more complicated. It would be the third time I fell in love with a girl.

And that could only lead to one conclusion, I'm as gay as Santana.


	13. What's Wrong

**What's Wrong**

_Santana POV_

I woke up by the sound of the phone. I was going to kill whoever bothered me at this time at night. At least they didn't wake up Britt, but I guessed she was too exhausted from our earlier activities. "Yes," I barked in the phone.

"Mija, did you get your tickets? Your dad and I would really like to see you. The flight is early, so you would have to miss your classes on Friday."

"I really want to see you too. I haven't checked the mail yet."

"Then they are probably there. We've to go to a conference. If the tickets aren't there, call the travel agency. Love you."

And she hangs up. I can't help but wonder if she really wants to see me, or that she thinks she is obligated as a mother. She never wants to speak with me, according to our one minute phone calls. I feel the urge again to get a bottle alcohol. I couldn't do that again, not over them. It had only been 13 days since my last drink. I could do this. But all I could think about was the awesome feeling that drink would give me. It felt like my body was acting automatic, when I opened the cabinet with the drank. Grabbing the first bottle I could get my hands on. Unscrewing the lid and feel the familiar burning in my throat as a took a swig of it. It was only then that my brain caught up. I hated myself, I hated this weakness. I hated being dependent on alcohol to deal with my parents. I put the bottle on the table. I would have Puck replace it for a full one, again. I was drawn to the bottle. I stepped closer to the table. Think of Britt, think of Brooke.

Britt, Brooke.

Britt, Brooke.

Britt, Brooke.

Britt, Brooke, Rae.

I don't know when Rae became part of my mantra, but it worked. I turned around, no longer seeing the bottle, made it a little easier. Britt, Brooke, Rae. Britt, Brooke, Rae. I walked away, repeating the names over and over again, until I fell in bed with Britt. I curled into Britt, putting her arm around me.

"What's wrong?"

"Hold me." She complies and put both her arms around me, her chest pressed against my back, and she kisses my neck.

"I love you. Try to sleep."

"Love you too."

We woke up early, despite Cheerio practice being cancelled, we forgot to change the alarm. Britt tells she loves me again and kisses me. "What happened?"

"They called, they send tickets for this weekend. They want to see me for some reason."

"Are you going?"

"Yeah, I want to see them. It will be nice to spend some time with them again. I know I shouldn't get my hopes up. They can't even talk with me on the phone for more than a few minutes. I was so upset last night."

"Did you?"

"Yeah, I did." She lied down on top of me and kissed me again. I eagerly responded. When breath became an issue, we pulled apart.

"I still love you." I pulled her in for another kiss. I needed to feel her love right now. It turned into a full make out session, when my phone rang. Damn it. Britt answered, "San's phone. We're not here." She didn't hang up and I saw at the look that it was something serious. A minute later she handed the phone to me, "Q, she needs you."

I took the phone. "Q, what's wrong?"

"Have you heard from Rae? We made plans last night, but she never showed up. And I tried to call her, but she didn't answer."

"Calm down Q, I'm sure it's fine. She's probably at school later."

"But what if something is wrong? What should I do?" She sounded so panicked. I don't know what was going on between those two, but there was definitely something.

"Don't do anything yet. We go to school, and if she isn't there by first period we go to her house. But I'm sure she'll be there."

"Okay."

"Okay," I reply, before hanging up. I tell Britt what is going on, and in record tempo we shower, eat breakfast and are on our way to school.

We found Quinn easily, as she stood in front of the school, scanning the parking lot. Britt gave her a hug. "Not here yet?" I asked.

"No." She didn't even look at me. "She isn't in her class either, I checked there already. And Tina said she would call me if she came in. Mike is watching her locker." Asking for help from the gleeks, this was really serious.

"What do you think happened?"

"I don't know. She didn't show up, and Rachel always shows up. And I called and texted her non-stop. If Finn hurt her-"

"Finn?" What did the oaf had to do with any of this.

"They had a fight yesterday morning. Mike interfered, but he didn't know what is was about. I'm gonna kill him."

"I'll help."

"Me too," Britt added. I looked at her shocked and even Q tore her eyes away to look at B. "What, I care about Rae too." The bell rang at that moment. School had started and Rae wasn't here, now I was getting worried. "We'll wait a few more minutes." Britt decided.

"Q," Sue yelled. "Why aren't you at class?"

"Rachel is missing."

"Well don't stand hanging around then. Go find Streisand. Take those two with you."

"Yes coach." The three of us responded. "We'll take my car," I said. We were just driving of the parking lot, when Rachel walked by. Q was out of the car before I even stopped.

"What happened?" I heard Q ask, while Britt and I were getting out of the car.

"An unfortunate accident." That was the understatement of the year. I finally got a good look at her, and her eye was black, her face was bruised and her left leg must hurt as she was putting all her wait on her right leg. Her sweater making it impossible to see her bruises there.

"We need to talk. Let's go to the choir room." I took the lead, because Q had no idea what to do or to say. "Text Tina and Mike that we got her." Rae was indeed limping and Q supported her, while texting at the same time. The choir room was empty as expected. "What happened Rae? We want the full story. Do you know how worried we were about you? Did you even check your phone?"

"No, why?" Rae asked, while looking through her bag. Finding her phone and unlocking it, there only followed an "oh." I looked over her shoulder. 50 missed calls, 30 unread text. Q was really worried.  
>"I'm sorry Quinn. I completely forgot, otherwise I would have let you know."<p>

"What really happened?" Q asked, sitting on a chair next to Rae. Me and Britt took some chairs in front of them, forming a little circle.

"Well, I was busy doing my homework, when I realized my calculator was downstairs. So I wanted to go get it, when I tripped over a book and fell down the stairs. My father really had the best intention, but he is so clumsy. Even Finn is not that bad. He tried to catch me, but his fist connected with my eye. I ended up with my head bumping against the wall. To be sure he took me to the hospital, but it was all good. I was there most of the night and when I came home I went to bed. I forgot to call or text you, I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I'm just glad you're alright." Q gave Rae a hug. The bell rang for the new class, and we all went our way.

I really wanted to talk to Rae alone, but I'd to wait to after school to get my chance. Britt had to go to dance class, which was on the way to Q's. They drove together and I texted Rae that she should drive with me. The car ride was silent, until I pulled over a few blocks from her house. "I need you to be honest right now. Did Finn hurt you?"

"No, why-"

"Did anyone else hurt you?"

"Santana, what is this about?"

"You didn't deny that someone hurt you. I don't believe your story. There is something you're not telling. I want the truth and I want it now."

"I might have changed a few bits." I gestured for her to keep going. "I didn't went down to get my calculator, but to get out of the house. I got tired of hearing my dads arguing. I didn't trip over a book, but an empty bottle. My father isn't clumsy, he was drunk. And I didn't go to the hospital, I know it wasn't anything serious. They helped me into bed and then left me, to go out."

That did sound a bit more believable. However I still had the feeling she didn't tell me the whole truth yet. But I shouldn't push her. "Do you want to go to the hospital?"

"No, it's fine. I've gotten enough injuries performing, I know when it's serious."

"Would you stay at my place? I think it's better, you could have a concussion. And your fathers aren't looking out for you."

"Thank you Santana, but I'll be fine. Can you please just bring me home?"

I complied and started driving again. I would keep a close eye on her from now on. There was something going on, I could feel it. I wished I was wrong and everything was just as Rae told me, but my gut told me differently. When I parked in front of her house, I broke the silence between us. "If you want to stay at my place, call me. I'll pick you up, no questions asked."

"I will, I promise. Now can you please relax?" I nodded, but I didn't mean it. I watched her until she was inside her house, before I stopped at Puck to pick up the new bottle. I gave him the money and the opened bottle. I like how he never asked questions. Once home I started packing my suitcase, just finished when Britt came by. She couldn't stay again this night, but we made good use of the time we had.

The next morning I woke up early to fly to Brazil. Wasn't it ridiculous that I had to take two planes and fly six hours, just to see my parents. And the worst part was when I arrived at the hotel by cab, that they weren't even there yet. I went to the room they booked for me, took a shower and ordered room service. Two hours later they finally showed up. There were hugs and kisses, questions about the flight. "We've a business diner in an hour. Would you like to come with?" Of course they were still working, at least I was allowed to come this time.

The diner was incredibly boring, they were discussing the new developments of equipment. And I sat there, being invisible. It wasn't until dessert that they remembered me. Mom was going on and on about my grades, how I combined that with cheerleading and glee club. How she was sure I was meant for great things, probably following in their footsteps. However they still hardly asked anything at me, they just talked about me. It was a mistake coming here, I should have stayed with Britt. I should be looking out for Q and Rae. I stood up. "Santana, what's wrong?"

"You are mom." And I walked away, ignoring her calling out to me. In my room I went straight to the mini-fridge. If I'd to survive a whole weekend with them, I couldn't do it sober. I didn't even try to fight it this time. By the time my parents finally showed up in my room, an hour or so later, I'd finished of all the alcohol in my room."Look who are here?"

"Santana what's going on? I don't recognize you when you act like that."

"That's because you don't know me." I shouted at her.

"Don't talk to your mother like that." My father interfered. "We know you, we care for you and we love you."

"Strange way of showing it." I muttered.

"Say what the problem is and we'll fix it." My mother promise me. I laugh at her.

"The worst part is that you don't even know what the problem is. You're going on and on at diner about me, but you don't even know me. You only know my achievements, that's all you care about." I grab a wine bottle of the table, before realizing its empty. "All I want is you home, and really home. Not in your study working or going on visits. I want to talk with you on the phone for more than a minute. I want to tell you I've a girlfriend and I want to introduce her at you. Something I want to do in person and not over the phone, but I can't. Because you're never home. You're never home." I shout the last part, before throwing the empty bottle at my parents and storming out of the room.

Fifteen minutes later I'm in a pub, with already two empty glasses in front of me. My parents tried to call me a few times. I just order my third whiskey, when they call again. I answer this time.

"Santana where are you? We need to talk."

"Horrible isn't it. Wanting to talk with someone, but not knowing where they are. Not until you get some stupid postcard. I'll tell you were I'll be tomorrow. On a plane home." And I hung up. Immediately I called the travel agency to change my tickets, which wasn't a problem luckily. I finished my next whiskey, when I got a text. I expected it to be from my parents, but it was Britt.

_I think something is wrong with Rae_.


End file.
